Augustus Caesar Posted July 30, 2007 Report Share Posted July 30, 2007 As Emperor I have a task for a good General to raise an army to chase down a Gaulish tribe who refuse to confrom to our ways of life and accept Roman traditions and values. They spit on our Gods and disrespect our women folk and kill the locals who have subscribed to our lifestyle. They rob the settlements of our hard earned taxes and take the tribute meant for Casear's purse!! This cannot be allowed to continue. All our legions have been posted elsewhere and we have none to spare. I am looking for a retired General to go on one last campaign and promise him untold riches if he can raise a powerful army to destroy, once and for all, this marauding mob of barbarians the Gauls have so unnervingly put together behind our backs. I will not tolerate fools seeking riches to be squandered away or men who think this would give them an easy living. I want a good strong leader who can control his men with an iron fist and not be allowed to be corrupted in any form. Once this man is chosen we can allow him to select his own men to carry out this task. Who is willing to come forward and protect Rome's interests? Who is willing to take on the 10,000 or so maddish Gauls and crush them? A land of rich fertile soil ready to make the right man a fortune awaits the end of what is hopefully a successful campaign. Are there any takers out there who can offer me a sound reason to take them on? I call upon you to give me your credentials. Rome awaits......... Augustus Caesar awaits.......... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
caldrail Posted July 30, 2007 Report Share Posted July 30, 2007 Marcus Larconius Ralla throws aside a tunic and stands up. In the name of my illustrious ancestors, who fought for Rome, I too would do my bit. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bryaxis Hecatee Posted July 30, 2007 Report Share Posted July 30, 2007 Salve Augustus. Allow me to present myself : P. Laelius Macer, veteran of the X legion. After my tour of duty during which I rose up to the rank of primipilus I retired to the estate your general L. Valerius Pulcher gave me in gratitude for the time I saved his life during a battle. Since them I've been living from the revenues of the place and I long to take once more the military cloak and the gladius. I'm yours to command. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kosmo Posted July 31, 2007 Report Share Posted July 31, 2007 I'm Aghatocles Ulpius from Histria, a wine trader, and I propose, you, sacred son of gods a cheaper plan for a greater victory. I can sell you a lot of wine that we will divide in two great parts. The first we give to the filthy tribesman that annoy you, as a gift for peace. Of course, a men of terryfing skill named Pertinax will spice this wine with some special "flavours". The other part of the wine will be given to the tribe north of this scums after they finish of the drunken survivors in exchenge for the slaves they capture for me. This way no general will got the leadership of an army that he could bribe, with loads of wine, to march on your rich imperial palace rather then on the desolate lands of the barbarians. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
caldrail Posted July 31, 2007 Report Share Posted July 31, 2007 Bah! Macer is fat and unfit, an old man living on past glory. Aghatocles I fear will only succeed in rendering our army drunk, since no legionary can easily be parted from wine! No, Caesar, you need the aggressive instinct of a successful businessman born of a proud military family (Ralla sticks tongue out) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
docoflove1974 Posted July 31, 2007 Report Share Posted July 31, 2007 No, Caesar, you need the aggressive instinct of a successful businessman born of a proud military family (Ralla sticks tongue out) You mean of Brutus the Barbarian Baby Eater! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bryaxis Hecatee Posted July 31, 2007 Report Share Posted July 31, 2007 Bah! Macer is fat and unfit, an old man living on past glory. Aghatocles I fear will only succeed in rendering our army drunk, since no legionary can easily be parted from wine! No, Caesar, you need the aggressive instinct of a successful businessman born of a proud military family (Ralla sticks tongue out) This is easily said by you, you who are related to gladiators ! Yours words are as low as your position in our society. I keep firm and strong and fit for I know the Emperor may always call upon me to serve. I work my fields daily and spends more time exercising than an active duty centurion, and am in a better physical condition than a bithynian slave ! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Augustus Caesar Posted August 1, 2007 Author Report Share Posted August 1, 2007 What's all this....? Jealousies in our ranks? This can't be right!! I asked for a man who can be unflinching in anything they have thrown at them. A man of great character and self belief. A man who knows no bounds where the enemy are concerned and will take no easy way out. So far I get a tongue wiggling centurion who thinks beer swilling merely lays troops down and too drunk to give their all and a wine merchant who wants to see the Gauls rolling around in a river of wine. The third applicant has a chance but needs to persuade me a little more. Retirement can make one lazy and fogetful of his duties and honour. All is not lost my noble gentlemen. Give me a good story of one of your campaigns and I'll judge you on that. Make it all too fanciful and you could face being back in the legions stuck on patrols on a one man island!! So, be careful. Tall stories I know only too well... I know a little of each of your histories and could make a choice now but I need one more factor which will make me choose wisely. Macer, Ulpius and Ralla - your very livelihoods rest on your story... so do it well and tell me what I want to hear. Others may yet come forward. I have a had a lady of noble birth dressed as a centurion (very convincing too) but my Praetorian spotted her. I think the promise of riches untold got toher a little!! As I tell you this I am being informed that the Gauls are amassing on the border with Germania. The Senate have advised me to send the trusted 41st legion to take these barbarians to task but I resist. I know we have a great leader among you and that you will choose your troops well. I salute you and look forward to your tale of strength, honour and glory for the love of Rome and her Emperor. You have only hours to prepare then you shall be brought before me in the Palace and I shall listen intently. I will give no sign of any favouritism while your greatness shines through the glorious battle you describe. And now I shall retire..... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nephele Posted August 1, 2007 Report Share Posted August 1, 2007 What fun! Uh... *cough* I mean... Sir... What a rousing call to arms! (Nephele wonders whether she may have blown it already, as if being of the feminine persuasion isn't already likely to elicit guffaws of hearty laughter as she purposefully strides into the tablinum of Augustus Caesar. Nephele narrows her eyes and hisses like a cat at the other applicants, daring even ONE of them to so much as smirk.) Honorable Augustus Caesar... Those Gauls... Ohhhh, those Gauls... Well, what can I say? They gall me. I present my history to you, esteemed Augustus Caesar. Stolen in infancy was I. By pirates. By GAULLISH pirates. Robbed I was, of my family name and heritage, as I was forced into servitude -- and bondage! Woo-hoo! (Oh, sorry, not that kind of story...). I know not what my original Patrician gens might have been -- having been given the Greek slave name of "Nephele". The Greek language and culture was an affectation of my Gaullish master. He was such a pretentious Guppie. ("Gaullish Urban Professional"). Ohhh, my anger still burns hot on account of the insults I have suffered at the hands of those Gauls. I assure you, m'lord, I am a most belligerent bellatrix. Grrr! As for my usefulness in battle... Well, what I lack in manly upper-arm strength, I more than make up for in feminine deviousness and craft. I can spy for you, and also easily slip into an enemy leader's tent and doctor his wine or supper with poison. I know these Gauls well, from having too many of my years stolen from me as their prisoner. My loyalty to Rome and to my commander is fierce -- Rome I was stolen from by the Gauls, but Rome is my home! I humbly (well, okay, not too humbly) petition you to sign me on! -- Nephele Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bryaxis Hecatee Posted August 1, 2007 Report Share Posted August 1, 2007 Well Augustus, you asked for my story so here is it. I did engage voluntarily in your armies when I was 17 because my father, himself one of your always loyal soldiers, had shown me the way on how to best serve the Empire. After 2 years in the Nemausus garrison I was promoted decurion to command a small observation post near Nemausus. There I patrolled vigorously the area and stopped two small bands of Gauls trying to get inside the Gallia Narbonensis and defeated them and routed them and and captured their survivors who were then sent to the Spanish mines. After these small victories I was promoted to the rank of Tesserarius, a rank I held for one year before I was again promoted, this time to the rank of optio, for my actions in battle were I saved the life of a group of my men by holding the Gauls while our soldiers reformed behind me around the body of our fallen centurion, an action which also gave me the crown of the Preserver. After this our unit was sent to Spain where troubles were brewing with the Celtibers which the two legions of the garrisons could not keep. It was a bad affair, this war, but once again our unit proved it's worth and I got promoted to the rank of centurio when I got the Corona Muralis for being the first to storm a celtiberian wall and opening the doors of the town to our troops. The Hiberian campaign lasted two more years until the peace was restaured and our unit was sent back to Narbonensis. But soon you tasked us with a new mission in Illirya where pirates had made themselves a nuisance once more. What is there to say about this campaign ? Sea battles we fought onto the bridges of your ships, something I must confess not to have liked very much but during which I got a naval crown because I was thrown by the pack of my men in my back onboard an enemy ship which we took. Land battles we had not much, but we had some and we won them. Siege we also had and I got a second corona muralis for storming another wall, but it was not in my view as worthy a feat as my first one. At the end of the campaign I was against promoted, this time into the rank of the Primi Ordines. We came back to Gaul just in time for the great raid of Velacissaunus, the gallic slave who escaped from our mines and raised a 5000 men strong army to seek vengeance upon us. It is during this battle that I saved the life of our general L. Valerius Pulcher when the barbarian unhorsed him after overruning two of our centuries, leaving him out of his senses. Standing fast on the ground with my men I protected him and rallied those defeated soldiers that ran past my men and I, reinforcing my unit, until a tribune could come to our help and the battle was won. For this action I got a Civic crown and was promoted to the rank of Primus Pilus which I held until my retirement two years ago. This is my story, Augustus, as complete as can be without entering into too many details : indeed I have not spoken here of my medals for torcs, armillae and phalerae I have received many times during the years, and I also own two hasta pura. I leave it up to you now Augustus to decide if I am competent enough to lead your armies to victory. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kosmo Posted August 1, 2007 Report Share Posted August 1, 2007 No Ralla, no greedy soldier would put his hands on my wine. The wine will be carried by a couple of thousends fearless vestals recruited from the brothels of Alexandria and Pireus. No gaul would resist the power of Bachus, the deadly sweetness of the magic herbs and the diseases brought by the wrath of Venere. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Augustus Caesar Posted August 1, 2007 Author Report Share Posted August 1, 2007 Ah you are doing your best to convince your Emperor!! I have but a couple of stories to hear and my decision will be made. Go take your places in the outer rooms where a slave will tend to your requests... nothing excessive mind you or levy's will fall upon your properties to pay for it!! These stories have made me thirsty... "Praxus.. can't you see I need a drink after listening to thes tales from our heroes - and heroins!!?? Bring me that amphora and have my good lady wife join me. Off with you!". Marcus Agrippa returns from another campaign and is ready to see me on some important business... he'll have to wait! I need to listen to these other histories and decide Gaul's fate before I listen to my good and loyal friend. As of now the Gauls are daring to cross into Germania and cause untold damage. We need to move quickly! This is a decent wine. "Praxus, you have bought well today. You may take your leave for a short while and enjoy some of thisfine wine. Be careful though." Julia is throwing a tantrum as her latest lover is telling her he has been posted to Africa. The Nubians are stirring and this is a good opportunity to let her settle down and change her flirtatious attitude. Maybe a coaching from our Nephele may do the trick... or would she serve me better in Gaul? Hmmmm........... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bryaxis Hecatee Posted August 1, 2007 Report Share Posted August 1, 2007 I thank you, Augustus, for your kind words. And I shall now retire as you instructed me, to read some of your Divine Father's writings on the Gauls of the North and the Germans, as well as some of Poseidonios writting on those warriors. Maybe a cup of wine could be brought for my thirst along with the proper volumen ? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Klingan Posted August 1, 2007 Report Share Posted August 1, 2007 This should be a time of action not words! The Gauls are roaring their battle cries as we speak at our border as we speak. Choose your general, great Caesar, before it's too late! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Augustus Caesar Posted August 1, 2007 Author Report Share Posted August 1, 2007 P. Laelius Macer... Praxus will attend to your needs... that is his role in life is it not? Who is this Klingan who wishes to hurry me along? An imposter who wishes me to make a mistake? No actually, a keen advisor who is thinking ahead of the Empire being swamped by those who dare to oppose me. Fear not my dear Klingan... for I have a cunning plan............ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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