What you're thinking of is mostly the Illiad and the Odyssey, the references which drove the greek culture and were in part adopted by the romans (first greek books translated to latin, some of first attempts of latin higher litterature being attempts to do roman equivalent of the story, place of the Enneid from the Augustean era onward) : Homer's books were really the closest the ancient western world had to chivalry code. It spoke of what a man could, should and would do if he truly was manfull, and what he should not, what would ashame him and what would bring him honour. The romans added their own concepts of, amongst others, Majestas, Gravitas and all that made up the Mos Maiorum (behaviour of the ancestors) to this greek heritage, and this made up what the higher class at least would take as a good and respectable etiquette.