caldrail

Switch on the television today and chances are a car advert will appear. Not sure why they're so frequent all of a sudden but it might have something to do with the daft names they give cars these days. Go? Ka? Cee'd? What's all that about? Now I see one for the Vauxhall Adam. What next? The Nissan Nigel? Toyota Terence? The Ford Fred? God forbid someone should build a car called Eve. That will bring new meaning to a warning sign for "road humps". I can't help thinking that the use of 'fun' names is to try and compensate for a boring motorised shopping trolley. That would be bad enought, but the adverts themselves are just so daft Watching a vehicle swerve through an urban landscape to avoid getting splashed wiith paint by jealous buildings is an interesting piece of media, just not an interesting car to feature. Watching a high diver slip majestically through the space left by open doors of a suspended vehicle is clever, but when would you actually park a vehicle on its side twenty feet above a swimming pool? Truth is, it's the visual theme or the music soundtrack that's more interesting than the hybrid eco-buggy they want you to buy. Good album that. Must log onto iTunes and download it. Adverts can be pretentious too. "Soul of motion"? What's that? A mystical force created by all moving things that surrounds us, binds the universe together? I have this image in my head of car designers sat at their workstations with the blast shield down, stretching out with their feelings to try and create a car that Han Solo will say is a match for a good blaster. I seriously don't believe that the adverts are right when they descrivbe a car as "breaking with convention". Not only do they look exactly like everyone elses, they probably are the same vehicle to all intents and purposes. Face it, a truly unconventional car wouldn;t sell. Car names used to be classy, or at least, better than the monosyllabic versions we get now. Even if the cars themselves were heaps of junk built in between tea breaks and strikes by union activists in the midlands of darkest Britain, the names were in a different league. Forget this idiotic obsession with trying to make customers believe their cars are in any way interesting. What we need are bold exciting names like Ferrari Fury, or Lamborghini Lacerator, names that inspire the designer to put a bit of life into their project. As it happens Audi has saved civilisation as we know it by showing their R8 with the engine cover removed on a rolling road. A quick acceleration through the gears then coming to a standstill, engine burbling menacingly, interspersed with some vicarious snorts and growls, exuding testerone and to my mind one of the best car adverts ever. Building Site Update Still fascinated by the Old College site visible from my back window. So are many other passers by, who stop at the wire fence to oggle the wierd and wonderful machinery used to excavate a massive canyon in the side of Swindon hill. It just keeps getting deeper. At the far end the channel is now so deep that even from my high vantage point, the diggers are almost lost inside. Before long it'll get so feep that the site will generate its own climate. There'll be hairy sub-human mutant tribes descended from long lost construction workers, dragging peoples cars into the depths at night to worship the starnge God of automobile mass production. Maybe they'll find archaeological evidence of my stolen Eunos Cabriolet? The Bicycle Cometh The road junction at the bottom of the hill can get quite entertaining. The traffic lights sometimes get out of sync and you can always tell when that happens because suddenly every vehicle in sight draws to an undignified halt with a crecendo of horn blasts. So noisy in fact that motorists are forced to communicate with sign language. Coming round the bend at the other end from me was a black BMW, accelerating quickly and risking angry gestures from frustrated motorists. I've noticed for a ong time that BMW drivers are often quite arrogant and self absorbed. He just couldn't resist a couple of hundred yards of empty road ahead of him. This was one of those strange moments when time seems to slow almost to a halt. Even at that distance, even with his tinted windscreen, we locked eyes on each other. We knew each others mind. He wanted to tear past me enjoying his germanic performance. I wanted to cross the road at a pedestrian crossing. He looked at me. I looked at him. He gunned the accelerator, I pressed the fateful button. He gritted his teeth in a determined dash to beat the lights. I waited patiently with a smug grin. His car slithered to a halt before a red light with a flattened nose visible on the glass. I walked across the road unflustered and victorious. Bow down before the might of civilisation, BMW driver. But what's going to happen after the government have invested gazillions of pounds promoting bicycles instead of keeping roofs over the heads of unemployed people? Truth of the matter is cyclists have a rule book all of their own, and it isn't very thick. They routinely ignore pedestrian crossings or bye laws prohibiting cycling on the pavement. Just the other morning a youngster performed a wheelie whilst managing to avoid the pedestrians. He aimed his bike in my direction. I looked at him with raised eyebrows He brazenly defied sanity by continuing his wheelie. I got out of the way. So there you have it. The bicycle is more powerful than the BMW. Or me.

There is of the famous quote that the Holy Roman Empire wasn't holy, wans't Roman, and wasn't an empire.

People sometimes get away with some serious antics in light aeroplanes. I once saw a guy land a motor glider with a last minute steep turn pver the control van. Not recommended. But then I used to land early model C150's with full flap at 40deg - the plane comes down at a heck of an angle but useful for getting into a field in a short distance - which is not recommended as I discovered from an instructor afterward. Nor for that matter is excessive crabbing recommended for landing - the problem being that if encountering variant airflow at low altitude you really can't do much about it. One intersting thig about airline flying isn't so muuch what they learn on, but what they practice every day. A bunch of guys were taught to fly a spitfire for a documentary recently. The airline piot failed the course before qualifying on Tiger Moths because he was used to the 'fly by wire' response and momentum of a heavy Airbus. 'Sink rate' is a situation that can afflict heavy aeroplanes and isn't necessarily linked to glide angle. Some modern jet airlines will descend happily in a near or fully stalled state thanks to their stability design and control system. If your downward velocity is excessive you're looking at potential undercarriage collapse and please remember that the pilot will naturally want to 'flare' his aeroplane at the last moment, causing extra load on the gear because of the length of the aeroplane and therefore the undercarriage members longitudinal offset. Airliners are quite efficient gliders as it happens but unfoprtunately they tend to have lots of freight or people strapped in the back, weight that restricts their performance, and for that matter, attempting to glide back to the field is one of the most lecturable mistake an instructor will berate you for. Generally you won't make it, and trying to extend a glide to do so leads to disaster, which is the case in point as in recent years a light aeroplane crashed trying to return to the runway. A better policy is finding a landing spot ahead, if possible. Wrecking an aeroplane is fine if it's done controllably and you can all walk away from it after. I don't know about America, but in Britain the phrase is "I have control", which must be confirmed by the other pilot. I do understand however that in the recent Hudson River landing the senior pilot said "My aeroplane" for the same effect (and it was confirmed by the co-pilot)

Actually Poylbius says these things among others... ...it must be admitted that from this point of view the Laconian constitution is defective, while that of Rome is superior and better framed for the attainment of power, as is indeed evident from the actual course of events.... ...But the quality in which the Roman commonwealth is most distinctly superior is in my opinion the nature of their religious convictions. I believe that it is the very thing which among other peoples is an object of reproach, I mean superstition, which maintains the cohesion of the Roman State.... ...Such being the power that each part has of hampering the others or co-operating with them, their union is adequate to all emergencies, so that it is impossible to find a better political system than this. For whenever the menace of some common danger from abroad compels them to act in concord and support each other, so great does the strength of the state become, that nothing which is requisite can be neglected, as all are zealously competing in devising means of meeting the need of the hour, nor can any decision arrived at fail to be executed promptly, as all are co-operating both in public and in private to the accomplishment of the task which they have set themselves; and consequently this peculiar form of constitution possesses an irresistible power of attaining every object upon which it is resolved. When again they are freed from external menace, and reap the harvest of good fortune and affluence which is the result of their success, and in the enjoyment of this prosperity are corrupted by flattery and idleness and wax insolent and overbearing, as indeed happens often enough, it is then especially that we see the state providing itself a remedy for the evil from which it suffers. For when one part having grown out of proportion to the others aims at supremacy and tends to become too predominant, it is evident that, as for the reasons above given none of the three is absolute, but the purpose of the one can be counterworked and thwarted by the others, none of them will excessively outgrow the others or treat them with contempt. All in fact remains in statu quo, on the one hand, because any aggressive impulse is sure to be checked and from the outset each estate stands in dread of being interfered with by the others. Histories Book VI (Polybius) He's describing a state that corrects itself, implying a dynamic revitalisation, and one that is adapted to success. Go ahead, read it. That's what he says. There's no common misconception at all. This has nothing to do with stoic philosophy. It represents his pride in Roman achievement, particularly in the light of Carthaginian defeats (whose empire he he sees as degenerate, and would shortly be conquered finally in the 3rd Punic War), and his belief that the 'Roman Way' is bound by fate - a superstitious ideal that emerges in Roman writings and one that reflects the realisation of the Roman public of cultural destiny. Perhaps a little self deluded, but they knew they were heading for better things and that instilled a 'feel-good' factor in Roman society (not to mention arrogance), and since Polybius declares superstition as one aspect of Roman cohesion, we can hardly deny his point.

Remember that not everyone in Rome was wealthy and those that were often wanted their votes. In order to do that the Romans had a culture nof beneificence toward the public (as two faced as it was).. However there was a nminal fee charged for the baths. Technically anyone could go there but that's an inconsistency with normal Roman cuture which was deeply stratified (you could be arrested and tried before a magistrate for sitting in the wrong seat at public performances for instace). Although the very poor could go there, hints exist that they may not always have done so. Partly because of the fee charged (if you're poor, the baths are still a luxury you might not want to afford, and if your patron sees you enjoying the baths and hobnobbing with his rivals, what's he goin g to say the next you visit his house in the morning begging for money?), partly becuawse the poor aren't going to comnfortable socialising with the elite (and vice versa), and partly because the poor generally care less about hygiene anyway.

Admissions to tjheatre and events were free. Public generosity was very important for senior Romans.

Britain was never intended to be this warm. Could someone do something about that please? Or does that mean I have to pay more tax? My Big Mistake Of The Week I made a huge mistake. I admit it. Sometimes it happens. There it was on the television schedules - Doctor Who Live. pardon? My curisosity was aroused. I don't paricularly care for the childish and hyped up modern Doctor Who (it's just Harry Potter with a sonic screwdriver instead of a wand, a tardis rather than a Nimbus 2000) and I've ranted against the reliance on visual imagery instead of interesting stories (not to mention an intrusive and overwhelming music score), but genuinely I wondered what a live Doctor Who programme was going to be like. That was my mistake. I should have realised. What I witnessed was a half hour programme dedicated to revealing the actor who will play the new Doctor Who. All done in true game show style. I paid my license fee for this? What was the BBC talking about when it said 'quality programming'? I think Jeremy Clarkson should be the new Doctor Who. Powersliding the tardis around a time/space anomaly whilst on fire is right up his street. And he can have james May expaklin all the science as he goes. And Richard Hammond to fix things when it all goes horribly wrong. Let's face it, with the Stig at the controls, who is going to travel in time faster? A lost opportunity to save civilisation as we know it. Baby Alert Ooops. Too late. Sorry about that. Moan of the Week Having looked closely at my finances I discover how frighteningly small my profit margin is. Happily however being paid every two weeks means that in two months of the year I get more money than usual. That being the case this month, I decided it was time I allowed myself the luxury of a visit to my local Subway. That might not seem very luxurious to some, but then a meal for four pounds is quite expensive for my budget. Besides, it gets me out of the house for a while, and who knows, I might meet someone. Isn't that what self-help pundits normally tell us? My shrinking world could do with stretching a little. Sometimes it feels like that episode of Star Trek Next Generation when the ship gets more and more restricted in size - I think they did two episodes on that theme as it happens, once with Captain Picard retreating from a deadly radiation sweep whilst battling terrorists, and once with Dr Crusher quite literally in a universe of her own. Fact is, if my world gets any smaller, I'll pop out of existence altogether, which I strongly suspect would please some people no end. Since there's no Scotty to beam me up, I'll just have to make what I can of the situation. I sat down to enjoy my meal. Normally I don't get bothered by anyone, but I couldn't help noticing that a couple were staring at me from across the aisle. Not admiring glances, or genuine curiosity, but quiet contempt and outrage. Ah yes. Being unemployed these days means that you're not allowed to spend money on anything enjoyable - that's a right reserved for decent hard working people. So despite paying my billls and taxes, despite complying with all the requirements of the jobseekers coontract, despite my continued search for gainful employment, I must suffer the social disgrace of not having a job. Welcome to David Cameron's brave new world, The Big Society. If anyone doesn't understand what it is. what it amounts to is a charter for moaning minnies to make other peoples lives even more unpleasant than they already are and claim a moral right to do so. The sooner that idiot is voted out office the better as far as I'm concerned.

No. In the same way that biolgical cells combine to make a human being, so individual human beings combine to make a society, which will display dynamic and naturalistic qualities, including dying of old age, catastrophe, or violence. Older cultures, especially successful dominat ones like Rome, tend toward a lazy middle age and a somewhat docile and ritualistic old age. Nothing lasts for ever, not even our political analogues of biolgical life. Even Polybius said that in 150BC (though he did assume the Roman system was superior and would be an exception - in that, at least, he did not predict the changes that brought Rome into line with everyone else and thus the political aging process took place).

Reading Polybius will sort many of your answers, but in the short term, peruse this site... http://www.attalus.org/bc2/year150.html p1. General views are always hard to say but along with the generals and senators aforementioned do we know of particularly fashionable Gods, curses and clothing. The toga was still de rigeur for formal occaisions. Loose tunics otherwise, and that didn't much change during the Republic. p2. Is one area of Rome a little dodgy, I know the majority lived in Aventine but perhaps it is documented the Oppian hill has troubles All areas of Rome are potentially dodgy in one way or another, especially at night, given that rich and poor lived in close proximity almost throughout the city.. However, the Subura distirct had a particularly sour reputation for poverty. p3. Can I assume everything Is bartered no ticket prices The Romans had discovered money - but they probably haggled over everything they couyld. "Let the buyer beware". p4. Can a few read/write yes. The wealthy get traditional schooling as children and literate slaves are at a premium. p5. Do senators live in the lesser regions still. Depending on wealth and fortune, yes. p6. Would it be fair to assume some people have never left the city Yes. p7. Is Hannibal still a big talking point amongst the people (senate too) Not big news any more, but since he was still at large, he would have been more or less thought of in the same way as Bin Laden was recently. Out there somewhere, possibly plotting... Legion l1. Were you paid in arrears monthly or some specific way At a special parade, three times a year.in arrears, for 2 Obols a day, about a third of a Drachma/Denarius. Centurions received double pay.[/b] 2. Did/could you buy your equipment from the legion smithy No. They weren't that organised back then. You either got what you wanted from civilian traders and artisans or obtained equipment by other means, though men were made to swear an oath not to steal from each other on campaign. l3. Were fancy engravings common on armour or was most extremely similar No, but painting mat have been. 4. Once levied did you have time to go home and pick up your things That would depend on circumstance. However, if no-one brought any equipment, I imagine something might have to be done. l5. If levied in Rome were you trained en route to destination. As recruits did you stay in legionary contubernium tents while en route You were trained with the rest of the conscripts according to the desires of the leading officer. It was entirely plausible that in emergencies you didn't receive any training at all, but then, this was ancient Rome, and men were expected to be able to fight anyway. l6. Were there barracks at most major cities for troops. No. l7. Was chainmail a luxury An expensive but very desirable piece of protection. m1. Beards and long hair, I'm under the impression both are frowned upon, beards are to Gallic and barbarian and long hair to Greek, yes? beards and long hair were unfashionable and denoted barbaric status. m2. Were there well documented popular wines - Vesuvian, Sicilian Wine was considered a 'democratic' drink as it accounted for the primary refreshment for the majority of Roman people, rich or poor. However, greek wine was favoured in this period, with home grown vintages becoming established. There may have been spanish wine on the market - I'm not sure about that. m3. Were there higher alcohol level drink available like fortified wines, mead, non-grape Wine was normally mixed with water immediately before drinking, since the fermentation was not controlled and the alcohol grade was high. Wine was sometimes adjusted and "improved" by its makers: instructions survive for making white wine from red and vice versa, as well as for rescuing wine that is turning to vinegar. Wine was also variously flavored. For example, there was passum, a strong and sweet raisin wine, for which the earliest known recipe is of Carthaginian origin; mulsum, a freshly made mixture of wine and honey; and conditum, a mixture of wine, hod matured. One specific recipe, Conditum Paradoxum, is for a mixture of wine, honey, pepper, laurel, dates, mastic, and saffron, cooked and stored for later use. Another recipe called for the addition of seawater, pitch and rosin to the wine. A Greek traveler reported that the beverage was apparently an acquired taste.[28] Sour wine mixed with water and herbs (posca) was a popular drink for the lower classes and a staple part of the Roman soldier's ration. Beer (cervisia) was known but considered vulgar, and was associated with barbarians.[29][30] (Ancient Roman Cuisine (Wikipedia) m4. Do we know what the curse-words or phrases beyond our usual ones are eg. Gods Below, Jupiter's Beard rather than cac I don't know about this period, but typically the Romans hoped various misfortunes would fall the miscreant, and references to gods were kept personal and discrete (it wouldn't do to tempt fate, would it?) m5. Could I nickname someone by turning there name from Antonius to Antonio, Anto etc. (to many -ius' make it hard sometimes for readers to differentiate) Many Roman names were nicknames. Translation is hilarious - they sound like comic book twenties gangsters. m6. The majority of slaves would have been from what nationalities Greek and African I would have thought. m7. Like Venus was sort of the symbol of the Julii, did the rest of the families have a defining symbol or stamp, like Octavian's sphinx No, but a household would generally have a dedication to a particulaer diety for protection and fortune.

To eimply say that Caligula lasted four years and other Caesars three or four times that is not necessarily a strong argument, since it depends on circumstance as much as personality. There were some Caesars that didn't last a year and many of those were far less dodgy than Caligula. In the case of Nero you have to allow for his charisma and presence. Caligula just wasn't that affable or engaging as a personality, further hampered by deliberately and persistently mocking Cassius Chaerea, the praetorian prefect and veteran soldier who was among the conspirators. Nero had plots made gainst him but had the good fortune to uncover them,

I agree that Caligula gets a bad press and always had - but regardless of his faults (of which there were plainly many), I do think this is a case of no smoke without fire. He wasn't a particular easy guy to be near, and being an elite Roman in a cultural bear pit, it follows he was willing to do what he thought necessary to survive - and survive luxuriously. Further, he comes across as a young man with a serious black sense of humour and a callous disregard for others. He was also self important - on the one hand he wants the public to worship him as a god, and on the other, he had a foreign dignatary executed because he wore a fine purple cloak at the arena. The idea that Claigula was mad is simply more mud - there's little evidence for mental illness as such - an idea extrapolated from his decisions which sometimes appear strange if the actual reasons are not known. Thus he says to the Senate "My horse could do a better job than yu lot" and so the story of making Incitatus a senator survives. His legions refuse to embark on a british invasion for superstitious reasons, thus Caligula gets his revenge by making his "hard as nails" soldiers collect booty from Neptune instead by picking up seashells on the beaches. I don't think dismissing Suetonius is the answer. What is needed is a bit of insight and interpretation.

Last night I watced a documentary on BBC2 called Rome's X Tombs, which concerns mass graves discovered under what is now the site of Helena's Mausoleum (Constantines mother). It's a series of rough chambers absolutely jam packed with bodily remains, so many that if the first had not already decomposed, they wouldn't all fit inside. The bodies were wrapped in linen and plaster, reminiscent of north african practice, and many had small personal items buried with them. Who were they? No evidence of violence, but the researchers believe what's been discovered is a burial crypt for disease victims, and quite possibly for those who were members of family relations of the Equites Singulares Augusti, an elite cavalry formation. The presenters and experts refered to this unit as a 'regiment', which is an incorrect designation, but nonethel;ess a fascinating insight into Rome's daily life. An interesting documentary if you get the chance to see it.

The credit card. They'd love it.

The problem with an airliner in glide mode ios that it has various quialities that are greatly emphasised compared to smaller aeroplanes. They are very efficient airframes and in theory can glide very well indeed, but on the other side of the coin, the heavier weight will reduce performance. The recent Hudson River episode shows a good example of a pilot refusing a directive to make for a runway - in his opinion he couldn't make it - and subsequent tests showed that in perfect conditions 50% of attempts to make a runway failed, and with other considerations like extending the performance by activating the APU to keep electrical services online (which was the case at the Hudson River). However, as investigators found, emergency procedures are written for high alitiude alerts and the length of checklists makes low level emergencies very distracting and difficult to handle. From a purely aerodynamic point of view, airliners can sometimes adopt very high angles of attack and if the aeroplane stalls in this condition during what might appear to be a steep but otherwise undramatic approach, the aircraft might prove difficult to recover - remember that the aeroplane is loasing height rapidly at low altitude. With heavy jets the key phrase is 'sink rate', or the speed of descent which is not necessarily linked to the axis of the aeroplane.

The rain stopped. As if to sound "All Clear" the bells of Swindon's old town hall made seven dull clangs in the distance. Almost immediately an excited little bird settled on the telegraph wire across the back yard, chirping happily. People began to appear, pedestrians trying to carry on as if nothing had happened. Shortly after the insistent sirens and flashing blue lights of emergency vehicles barged through the traffic that had dared to continue their journey. The price we pay in Britain for all those sweltering hot summer days is a short sharp electrical shock. Actually our thunderstorms are quite modest compared to those you can witness in some parts of the globe, but they appear out of nowhere, always unexpected despite the warnings of television weathermen. I'd been playing my trusty old electric guitar, putting out riffs, harmonics, and long bends, all finished off with accentuated vibrato. Just the other night some guy passing my home ventured the opinion that I was a rubbish guitarist - I'm better than you'll ever be buddy - but last night the great Norse Thundergod had spoken. Modest or not, it isn't fun or safe to be caught by a British thunderstorm and for that matter, it isn't wise to leave your consumer electronics switched on. Besides, with nature giving us a free firework display, my attention was no longer engaged by music. The rain had come down in a torrent. A layer of splashes and bouncing raindrops was six inches deep on the tiles of the roof below my back window. I spotted others in the neighbourhood like me, watching the rain from their windows, enjoying this brief respite from the humid evening. Others did however get quite wet. One young lady trudged along the alleyway with her top revealing rather more than fashion intended. You see? Thunderstorms aren't all bad... But Not Always Good Definitely a muggy night. My home can get a bit warm and stuffy at the best of times, never mind daytime temperatures over thirty degres and high humidity. What made it worse was repeated thunderstorms during the night. At least my critics won't be outside the house tonight. Now if I could only switch these thunderstorms off, I could get some sleep. Forget The Rain This is the time of year when you can spot those who've been on holiday. In Swindon a suntan is unusual, to say the least, but it's always the same people who go abroad to sunny places. Obviously they're the ones with money in their pocket. I'm struggling to pay for food for the week, never mind a bus ticket down the road. In fact, the last time I went into a Job Centre with a suntan I was investigated. there was bloke following me around aty a discreet distance watching what I gopt up to. And they stopped my money that year too. I hadn't even left the town once, but then, their argument is that the government insist that unemployed people must be willing to travel to work for an hour and a half even if they can't afford to. That's the reality of being unemployed you see. MP's seem to think we all get a suntans at public expense. Thing is though - I can't help wondering how they feel about spending hundreds of pounds to suffer the aggravations of air travel and foreign languages, only to discover the weather's been just as good here? Oh yeah... I forgot... They've got a suntan.

Caesar never being emperor? There's a good reason why Suetonius included him in the list.

They had a limited form of citizenship. It was however prety much in name only as there was little they could do with their rights other than proclaim them.

That was mostly the cause of it, as imunera had pagan religious connotations, and also was a show in which blood was spilt. However the arena was becoming less popular as a result of changes inn style, moving away from the expensive spectacles of the past and toward smaller more modest shows, not to mention to trend toward 'wounding' fights with bizarre weaponry rather than good clean sword fights. Others point at the loss of social purpose in that the games celebrated Roman martial spirit, which was distinctinly lacking in the late empire.

I ought to point out however that 5th century gladiators were outside the law and no longer a central part of Roman society. They still existed, especially in the provinces, usually as wandering troupes of lower quality. The former schools had closed.

The last few days have been quite warm, a typical British summer, and that wa quite enough for me. Luckily the nights cooled things down. A bit. Before the weekend however, the weatherman on television was beaming with malicious delight. Watch out for the weekend - it's going to be a scorcher. Okay. yawn. I got up late this morning having been up all night. As usual in summer, the air within my home was a little stuffy but I had things to do, so the atmosphere was of little concern. As soon as I opnened the front door to go to the shops - Woah! A blast of hot air hit me. That weatherman wasn't kidding. This is seriously warm folks. Turning Into Ash At the bottom of the hill traffic was held up. Roadworks? There's been some further down. I was wrong however, as a small fleet of fire engines were parked up on the road junction. On the pavement, a burned out sports car. The local lap dancing club gutted by fire. It turns out some guy reversed his car into the premises and poured pertol over the vehicle before setting it on fire. Good grief, as if it wasn't warm enough around here already.... Turning Toward Triump Andy Murray has won the Mens Singles at Wimbledon. I apologise for the late news but since it took Mr Murray seventy years to win the match, I thought no-one would mind if I neglected to tell you immediately. Unfortunately David Cameron was a bit quicker off the mark. His suggestion to give Mr Murray a knighthood for winning at Wimbledon has left me a bit peeved because I won a game of conkers when I was twelve and the letter confirming my OBE still hasn't arrived. Oh yes, I forgot, the Health & Safety Executive made the game of conkers a threat to civilisation as we know it. I'll shut up before I get jailed for living dangerously. Vote for Murray - Turning Britain around. Turning Countries Around The dramatic events in Egypt have been the subject of considerable news footage. During an interview with some guy who apparently understood what was going on, the scrolling headline underneath said "Britain does not support regime change". Really? So we were right about those weapons of mass destruction in Iraq after all? My advice to the people of Egypt is to keep practising. Eventually you'lll get this military coup business right and finally win. Turning Jobseekers Around Our local library has been hosting a job club for a few years now. It's useful getting an extra couple of hours to search the world wide web for all those vacancies the jobsite adverts promise are out there. It's easy too. Unfortunately the library service have decided it's too easy as well, and now we're only going to get eight weeks each. How exactly does that assist me getting a job? By giving the opportunity to everyone else? And I've got a claims advisor who seems to believe I spend the entire day sat in front of a computer waiting for the next vacancy to appear.

This is not a well documented issue. On the one hand, we know that a contubernium of eight legionaries would share an animal between them to carry heavy loads (sometimes even their armour and weapons - the Romans mention this themselves) which implies they led the animals themselves. However, ordinary soldiers might own a slave (some were handed out from POW's as rewards though most would have been sold for profit quite quickly), and it isn't beyond reason that such dutioes fell to servants. An enterprising entrepeneur might even arrange for civilian labour to haul legionary equipment though in fairness I don't have any source material to confirm that. Oxen were powwerful beasts but probably too large and costly for common use in the legions. Mules would have been preferable and Cicero sympathises with a man whose mule was appropriated by the legions, which implies the soldiers didn't just use an allocated animal, but whatever animals they could get hold of. The odds of a mules owner getting any justice from a military tribunal were not good either, and might resuit in outraged soldiers beating him up later. Horses weren't used for draft work. I don't know whether camels were. As for commands given by the drover, that's probably open to speculation. Petronius does mention in his Satyricon that if a handler can't reach the donkeys back, he must thrash the donkeys pack, which does rather suggest that animals were given physical inducement rather than verbal.

Not normally. Contract gladiators might already be citizens (albeit temporarily enslaved and rendered infama). Rudiarii (Gladiators given freedom) had the same status as freedmen but probably didn't on the whole benefit from patronage in the same way as other freedmen, and I note many such men tended to fail outside the arena and so often drifted back to the life they knew best. As such, full citizenship was beyond their grasp, although I have heard of a few examples of gladiators having citizenship confrered upon them as a gift.

Plain old chemistry has always existed - I could not disagree - however it has always been to cause of the illicit romance which has long predated the rather ridiculous medieval version. There was of course the story of a rich daughter who gave up a life of luxury to run away with her favourite gladiator, a man not blessed with good looks or health, but a Gladiator! We also know that women of high birth sometimes discreetly attended gladiator schools for that very reason, hoping to get a session (or maybe more) from her favourite arena hero. Nonetheless at the higher echelons of society there's a definite trend toward expedience. Notice how, to use an extreme example, Cleopatra seduces Caesar and Antony, and even tried to see if she could get her claws into Octavian at one point. To her the realtionship, however much fun, was for practical purposes. She was a queen and needed the Romans to bolster her power inn Egypt on the edge of dynastic war. Roman women on the whole weren't particularly well regarded in some aspects, being somewhat infantile by modern standards (and often deliberately encouraged to remain so). Some of course had a brain in their skull and we do have examples of women who did more with their lives or who had real influence - I'm thinking of one in Pompeii who after her husband died inherited his business, and contrary to normal tradition, ran it for herself. She was however planning a marriage, purely for appearances (or possibly to avoid difficuklties for her children).

There is an element in these rare occurences that can't be ignored in the Roman tontext - to assume these people were marrying for love is a bit overly romantic and a modern hollywood-derived view. Marriage in older cultures was rarely for such concerns (witness the blossoming of the illicit romance in medieval fiction, such as Lancelot and Guinevere). Whilst I accept I don't know what was going through these peoples heads at the time, marriages were sought at that level for social, political, or financial gain .

Those sweaty summer nights are with us again. I blame America - we always get our weather secondhand from them. Hiowever I can't blame them for the behaviour of the locals. As soon as the warmth kicks in they start behaving like they're on a mediterranean holiday, shouting, throwing, or generally hitting each other. You might not be suprised to hear that happened last night. Again. Clearly the way to improve social behaviour is not by fines or visits to a magistrates court, but banning summer. When is our government going to do something useful? Move Along Please There's a bunch of african lads who've moved into the area turning our little preserve of working class England into some kind of Los Angeles in red brick and elm trees. They were out in the yard behind my home last night, enjoying themselves in a rowdy fashion and without having anywhere else to go in the wee small hours. They went quiet all of a sudden. Certainly wasn't down to me. i was too busy trying to find a comfortable sleeping position. Move Along, Please As the British normally do any hint of sun means we get into this strange contest to see who can wear the least clothing. I can't help thinking that people do that because it's merely fashionable or simply their way of fitting in with the crowd of aimless citizens wandering around town for no better reason than to justify minimising their wardrobe. Move Or Else Sorry lads. Not your house.