Ekballo Suus

Flies?

Do you have a dog or know someone with a dog? You might use its superior olfaction to your advantage...

My Lord: :notworthy:

 

Mayhaps the Pall of Death results from some dead varmints within the walls. Mayhaps those pesky squirrels, who munch on your verdure, have taken up residence in your wig-wam; are doing what comes naturally; and have established a cemetary corporation. The antidote - Jack Russells. They will track down the point at which any corpses are and will go bananas when a live one is snuffed.

 

If you have little 1/16" flying brown bugs, check your grain supply. We have an infestation of these foul creatures. Upon investigation commanded by the Presence, this very day, a bag of flour was found in which they were feasting, festering and procreating. Colonies had been established in a couple of open cracker bags. Said last are members of the recent past.

 

Don Tomasso

Another thought... do you have a crawl space beneath the house? Is there a furnace down there?

Not I hope , a dead albatross in your chimney stack?

I'm thinking it's a dead opossum somewhere in the basement/AC-Furnace Unit/Under the base boards. Could be a rat or a squirrel but it just smells too horribly juicy for something that small. I have crawled all through the crawl space (not a fun task, zillions of spiders) and found nothing.

 

I can sort of pinpoint it but am awaiting word from the landlord about how to proceed (before I start cutting stuff up).

 

The stench is beyond unbearable. :sadwalk:

Man, I hate Spiders! Anyways, just hire a professional. Then hire an exterminator to take out those stupid spiders.

Don Giovanni:

 

Must I tell you everything? Here in NYC, your problem is simply addressed. Have you ever heard of Grand Arsony? Take pics of your stuff for the insurance company. Get the good stuff out. Leave the carp you've always wanted to throw away in. Introduce a match into the business and fly away on the double. Will also manage the squirrel problem.

 

Option 'B':

Preliminaries same as above. Seal windows, doors, holes in the roof, etc. Suggest to favored chipmunks that flight is in order. Open all gas jets. Flee (on the triple) to a neighboring province with plenty of items to be 'tested'. Ex-Lax yourself on a lawn chair facing the soon to be former residence. You will soon see a blue flash of lightening reaching up to the Van Allen Belt; immediately thereafter a funnel of smoke will grace the picture and then one hellacious 'BOOOM'. Not only will this amend the foul odor and settle matters with the tree rats, but it also has the advantage of eliminating those nosy, pesky neighbors. What do you care? You don't own the teepeee! It's the landlord's problem.

 

Don Tomasso

Leave the carp you've always wanted to throw away in

 

Poor fish...what'd he ever do to you???

All y'all may have noted that His Greekship :notworthy: is AWOL. I have been informed by reliable sources that he took my advice. However he omitted one step of the protocol. A fatal blunder! He left his collection of computers to the whims of the gods in the now no longer existing hogan. The stench is gone. The teepee is now referred to in the past tense. The squirrels occupy an honourable place in Hades. Pesky neighbors have been blown to photons. And the computers, alas, are a fond, if troublesome memory. His Grace :notworthy: , is being comforted by a clan of chipmunks.