The library was quiet, far quieter than the usual subliminal murmur of curses, mobile phone conversations, and urgent discussions between young couples. Instead, an air of subdued boredom hung in the air. Not that it bothered me of course. I was too busy communicating with the outside world via the internet. At least I think it's the outside world. What a wierd thing it would be to discover all my virtual friends are actually figments of a computer program. Wow. That would be like being in The Prisoner for real. Except instead of white bouncy balls herding me back to confinement I've got claims advisors.

Anyhow, back to the library. By now I'm done communicating. Time to set about the next part of my day and today, I decide to pop back home for lunch before another visit to the programme centre and communal despair at the job club. Log off... Return the book I was reading to the shelf.... And now....

A ladies voice cut through the silence . "Thanks for freeing up a computor for us"

Pardon? What cheek! I get the same restrictions as everyone else who uses library computors. The librarian on duty raised her head and locked her laser rangefinder on the woman responsible for that outburst. Time to clear the area before hostilities break out. It could get messy.

Lunch

At last I seem to be mastering the intricacies of my microwave. I actually managed to reheat a dinner from the fridge and keep it edible. I should put that on my CV. Experienced microwave engineer. That almost qualifies me for a job in catering. Then again, why would I want to be shouted at for a living? That's like joining the army and I'm getting a bit old for that sort of thing. Well, my lunch is well and truly munched, so feeling satisfied with a tasty and edible feast, I can now pop down the programme centre without the need to march in step.

After Lunch

The government cuts have hit home. We used to have an office devoted to job club activities. Now it's a no-holds barred first-come-ffirst-served fight for survival and the chance to log onto a computer that actually works. One doesn't have a video card that likes Windows. Another doesn't have a keyboard. One tells us that it wants to be another computer, and I notice the staff have locked out the computers that work so they can carry on working.

I'm not deterred. By sheer persistence I've found a computer that does work and by the simple expedient of being first through the door, I get to log on and jobsearch to my hearts content. Or at least I would do if the other jobseekers weren't so illerate with computers. The whole point of a job club is communal assistance, so as the resident expert on using the things, various people lift their heads over the monitor with pleading eyes and beg me to help them.

One chap realised that making an online job application actually required some effort. He stopped and stared at me before asking "This is going to take a long time."

Yep. Sometimes it does. Especially if you haven't prepared a CV file beforehand.

"Wouldn't it be easier if you type my CV out for me?"

I can see this is going to be a difficult relationship.