With a quiet wednesday looming and more good weather to enjoy, the temptation to head for the hills was too much. In the early hours of this morning I packed my rucksack and set off into the gloomy twilight. The sun had barely risen a couple of degrees, so only between gaps in the urban landscape did that amber glow light up the sides of trees and houses.

The problem with hiking at this time of year is getting comfrotable. The early morning often brings a biting chill, as indeed today it did, and the sun warms all too easily. So one minute you're freezing, the next you're sweating. The experts would immediately suggest I use layers of clothes to control my comfort zone. Oh great. So I have to stop every ten minutes and change my clothes? This is a hike for crying out loud, not a fashion show.

Usually I find a compromise and put up with sweat. Rather that then suffer cold. But where shall I go today? Due to my health concerns I haven't been hiking lately so perhaps my fitness isn't at its peak. And worse, my medication specifically lists tiredness as a possible side effect. Okay, Liddington Hill it is. Not too far, albeit a steep climb, and a destination well within my abilities even with a heavy load and weakness pills.

As it happened, Liddington Hill was closed off because the farmer was grazing his herd of cows on the hillside. Luck of the draw there, I'm afraid, so I settled for the glorious view of the Og valley and surrounding landscape.

Mister And Misses Bull

While I sat taking in the panorama of rural Wiltshire, I was all too aware of the herd of cows gathering at the wire fence to see what this human being was up to. Hey, I'm just sittting here - are your lives that dull? Oh. I see. Okay, well carry on looking then.

As it happens, one bull of the two I spotted among the herd decided that watching me was boring and that he fancied bovine sex, like bulls do. Unfortunately the bull decided to mount his male colleague. I don't know if the farmer is aware he bought a gay bull, but I think the other bull does.

HI These

What is going on? All of a sudden people are saying hello to me. People wave to me across the street. A lady called me "handsome" as she passed on the library stairs. Just this morning I had two friendly greetings from young ladies, and that's on my way home from Liddington Hill, all sweaty and looking like I'd been dragged through a bush. Not that I'm complaining of course. I just wish I knew who these people were.