Getting To Know A Stranger
Walking home on sunday lunchtime I came across a lady walking her dog. Out of curiosity I engaged her in conversation about her canine companion, which turned out to be a Husky. We get a few breeds that are similar, such as Alaskan Mamelutes and such, but most of those have thicker coats so I didn't recognise this one.
The Husky in question was a perky little animal, friendly, and very keen on pulling its owner across Swindon. Whilst I was chatting a couple passed by with their bruiser of a dog, stocky build and short face. The two dogs immediately started wagging tails and approached each other for a sniff, as dogs do.
"Be good." Said the others dog's owner, "It just wants to get to know you."
The Husky dived in, up close and personal. I'm not sure what the correct phrase is for that particular activity, but rest assured the terrier was not displeased. Yep.... Thats what I call call getting to know you.... I mean, dogs just don't care, do they? This was graphic stuff, right in front of all witnesses, and we all burst out laughing. What if humans behaved like that? Can you imagine, an interested woman walking up to you all smiles and wiggly bottom, asking you to drop your trousers in the street?
Why do human beings make such a big deal out of courting? All that teenage angst, endless preparation, damage to the liver, impaired hearing, endless advice on how to be good at it, visits to the doctor when you are, and so forth. A part of me thinks it ought be like the films. One action sequence, a blast of violin music, and away you go. hey, how could a century of Hollywood block-busters possibly be wrong?
On The Box
One of the downsides of all these new television channels is that I now receive a handful of x-rated ones. Yopu might ask why that's a problem. Well, a couple of nights ago I got curious and investigated this source of lewd and decadent entertainment, purely in the name of scientific research you understand. One channel showed a woman doing slow motion gymnastics to get you make a phone call before the channel encrypted itself. Lots of quickfire adverts showing various women enjoying themselves and such, but mostly a grinning lady waving a mobile phone at the camera. Nope, not excited.
Another channel was a pair of young ladies in a paddling pool together. Now this looks more promising.
"We've been naughty" One enticed me to see more, "We've both had girl on girl action and we liked it."
So... Do they do action replays? Or is this just two girls chatting in a paddling pool?
"So phone us now on 0123456789"
And there they were, filmed chatting on the phone. Is is just me, or do dogs get a better deal than humans? Face it, the mobile phone is destroying decadence as we know it.
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