Bitch is back
Entry posted by docoflove1974
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On Saturday I went out on a first date with a gentleman. It wasn't an eventful date--in fact, it was positively boring and did not lead to an acceptance of a second date--but it brought to mind something I find completely useless. This person told me he never cusses, hates cussing, thinks it shows the denigration of our society...yet will use an "eff" to replace the proverbial f-word (aka "eff this, I'm gone). I'm sorry, isn't that the same thing?
When I was a kid, my parents did everything they could to not allow us to swear. I would routinely get my mouth washed out with soap, my mother hoping that would deter me from saying bad words. It never did work. But the point is, we really couldn't say the 'alternatives'; there was no 'darn it', 'shoot', 'crap', 'heck' or any other seemingly milder alternatives. My parents figured that if we weren't allowed to say them, we wouldn't try and sneak in the real versions. Of course, they cussed--my father more than my mother, but even my grandmother was guilty of it--which meant to my brothers and I that we could, too...just that we had to sneak it in.
As for me now, yes, I do cuss, but I make an effort not to do so in certain situations. Certainly when I'm first getting to know someone, I don't cuss around them; I rein it in. There's only one cuss word that will raise my hackles immediately; my upstairs neighbor Hank knows this, and will purposely 'avoid' it. Instead of saying this word, he'll say the phrase, "see you next Tuesday." (The phrase duplicates letters in whole or in part of that word, which, by the way, rhymes with 'punt'.) He rarely uses that term, and while I appreciate the fact that he won't say it around me, even when he uses the euphemistic phrase I don't really like it. Anything else is fair game to be used by me or around me...but in moderation, and in the appropriate situation. As my father preached, you can use that so-called f-word when you are in sudden and unexpected pain--think slamming your foot into the corner of a table leg--but even then, just holding in the word and just emitting a loud, painful cry is much better. He's right...yet he knows that he's the worst offender of this rule himself.
The moral of the story: if you're going to cuss, then cuss (appropriately). If you are going to avoid cussing, then don't use the alternative and say you abhor cussing. No double standards, dammit.
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