After the ribald and violent cacophany of the saturday night, last night was as quiet as the grave. Taking advantage of this unusual stillness I gave in to curiosity and sat down to watch the British Film Awards.

Award ceremonies aren't the sort of thing I usually watch. After the first few winners approach the microphone and say "Uuuh....", you kind of lose interest. Which is interesting in itself. I noticed that my attention varied in proportion to the awardee's ability and confidence at public speaking.

What suprised me was how many 'name' actors and actresses stood in front of an autocue and read aloud horribly pompous and inflated praise in a monotone voice, body frozen in place, eyes fixed squarely on the invisible screen in front of them. Others spoke fluidly, full of natural movement, and to be honest, all the more interesting to listen to as a result. One or two of those and I started cringing every time the host, the ubiquitous Jonathon Ross, made another attempt to make the audience titter.

Lots of expensive clothes, red carpets, flash photography, and I've forgotten almost all of it already.

Geography For Beginners

Every time I arrive at my local internet cafe I see the same thing. The Somali owners help other immigrants sort out official red tape in order to stay in England and claim our wonderful benefits. It gets a bit fraught too, usually over how many photocopies were printed off (I've seen some very creative accounting by some customers) or which document to be sent where, but on this occaision a heated discussion on where Muscat was, and was Jordan a Gulf-state?

How odd that an Irish woman put them all straight.

Bully In Office?

I'm no admirer of Gortdon Brown, but the recent accusations of bullying at No10 caught my attention. Without a doubt it's a high pressure job and the fact that some of his offfice employees have sought advice from a bullying phoneline suprises not one jot. Now, I don't know what the truth of this media story is, but given how long the man waited to get into office and how grimly he hangs on to power, I really can see him as being extremely pushy. His public appearances are always designed as exercises as image improvement, thus in all probability an unreliable guide to what the man is like to work for.

On the other hand, to be fair, I doubt working at No10 is a job for the faint-hearted. Bullied? Or simply not up to it? All a matter of perspective isn't it? One might claim however that Mr Brown really ought to have noticed his employees weren't happy.

The Latest News From Stockroom Street

My own personal soap opera has a new storyline just in. I came into work this morning to discover that J has spotted a change in the Facebook page for one of the girls on the shop floor. It seems KS has a girlfriend. His banter has won her heart, and of course being men we weren't interested at all in finding out the truth when she arrived at lunchtime for the late shift. Luckily for us she admitted it anyway despite our protestations we weren't remotely concerned whether the King of Banter was also a sex god.

So, I asked her, what are you going to do with him when you meet up on Friday night?

"Pffff!" She dismissed my question with some incredulence, "I'm not going to do anything with him"..

Oh boy, is KS going to be bored or what?