Frozen Britain now seems to be a communal obsession. Tv news devotes nearly half the program to features of people suffering the effects of actual winter conditions. It sort of gives you a warm feeling toknow that however bad it gets, the next county has it worse.

The trouble is though these weather reports are really not that reliable. A couple of days ago they showed blankets of snowfall about to drop on southern England. With typical British time-keeping, it might be a day late.

Checking the weather for any sign of a let-up I saw the weather-man tell me about a cold wind pushing in from the continent, and warning the chill factor was going to make it feel much colder than it already was. Yeah, whatever. I was out there that morning and it was almost balmy. Cold wind. Pfah!

I popped out early evening and what did I find? Yep. The weatherman was right.That was seriously not warm!

Still waiting for the promised snowfall though...

Ask And Ye Shall Find

No, I'm not waiting anymore. Looking out the window I see a veritable blizzard going on. I missed that walking across Swindon an hour earlier. It's that 'dusty' snow again rather than classic flakes, caused by humid air meeting cold winds. There. See? I have been listening after all.

Selling Skis

Popping in to my local supermarket I grabbed what I needed and made for the check-out. I've been using this supermarket for seven years now and you'd think I 'd know everyone there by now, but modern life isn't quite like that. Nonetheless, I decided to be sociable and talk to the bored lady making beeping noises with my shopping.

She saw me fumbling with gloves and money hidden away in my pocket. She asked whether it was cold outside. Pardon? Cold? Coming from a supermarket whose staff complain about the col during Summer? Erm... Yes it is cold... Do you sell skis by any chance?

My feeble joke fell on deaf ears and she advised me that a ski shop was located in Old Town. Thank you dear. Sold out of humour I see.

Doors of the Week

This award definitely goes to those cantankerous portals belonging to the library. You know those infra-red motion sensor things that operate doors? Usually they open sesame no problem at all (much to the chagrin of a local corner shop whose doors open and close every time a pedestrian wanders past on the street - Now there's a shop whose staff are entitled to complain about the cold).

At the library though the doors open automatically when they feel like it. On my way out I passed an old couple who seemed a bit confused as to why the library doors were so slow to allow entry. I wouldn't stay in there too long, I warned them, or you'll never get out again.

They chuckled politely, but I think they thought I really was joking.