I am by nature a creature that likes his food, and feeling a little peckish, I ventured into my diminutive pantry to determine what wonderful and exotic ingredients I had lurking in there. Ooh heck, this looks a bit sparse.... Uhhh... Any pot noodles left? Nope. Looks like another trip to the supermarket is in order.

The weather of course was damp and miserable. There was a time when we used to get scorching summers, but now the green brigade have banned noxious gases and nearly everything that causes them, it stays cloudy and wet. I turned the corner into the square where Isambard Kingdom Brunels statue stands proud. Before he turned up Swindon was an isolated market town on the hilll. It's fair to say then that he foisted Swindon upon the world. Not his greatest achievement then.

"Hello!" Called a voice in front of me. It was Miss R, a young lady I met some years ago during those heady days when I still had a job. Occaisionally I bump into her and we always have a little chat. Today was no exception. She was going to chat to me and that was that.

In fact, there was only one occaision she ever went silent. It transpired that at the time she was living round the corner from me, and when her car was in for servicing, asked if I could give her a lift. No problem. This was in the era when I drove Bessy, my trusty Toyota MR2 (The Ferrari-esque one of course) and whilst I wasn't deliberately showing off, the look on the her face as she realised I wasn't slowing down for that tight left hander was something I shall treasure forever.

The big suprise is that Miss R is now engaged to be married. Coming from a woman who describes herself as a dedicated 'Commitment-phobe', this was a shock equivalent to learning that Rambo's bandana was made of silk. Well congratulations R, hope it all works for you.

Like women often do she enquired as to my marital status. Don't think I have one of those. Don't you need a license or something? We shared a few jokes about being chained up. As R left to go about her business (even she has to breathe in sometimes) she departed with a cryptic comment and a knowing smile. I wish women wouldn't do that. You walk away wondering if they know something.

Dating Services

I've noticed just recently that there's been a big increase in adverts for dating services. Television adverts proclaiming there's a shortage of 'hot new men' followed an advert advising us that there's lots of 'hot new men'. Yeah, well, personally I'd prefer lots of 'hot new women' but given my age and financial circumstances, it wouldn't make any difference if they were laying siege to my castle. Might be fun letting them try though.

I'm reminded of those late night adverts for phone networking with... yes, you've guessed it, 'Hot New Women'. You get a thirty second glimpse of two young blondes making seductive glances at the camera whilst studying their mobile phone. I can't help feeling it's a tad dishonest because those two girls on screen aren't likely to be the women you talk you on the phone. Not that I've tried it you understand. Mobile phone charges are expensive enough without this sort of semi-*or* fantasy.

Now along comes another service that proclaims they don't match people by any such means, but make careful comparisons of personality and mindset to produce the perfect match. Along with images of happy contented couples of course.

I would be curious to know how many people of the hopefuls paying out money for these services actually do meet the partner of their dreams, or are they simply being sold false hopes? There's a part of me that thinks these customers are being sold an alternative to learning new confidence and social skills. It looks good on the wrapper, but there's really nothing in the box.