Dreams are funny things aren't they? They say your mind works things out at it's leisure during your slumber. Last nights big feature dream in widescreen imagery was me and someone else robbing a till from a shop. I can't remember the details of how this all started, but we went in, my colleague threatened the shopkeeper (I think he had a gun or something) while I stood there gormless until I realised I was supposed to take things from the till.

Anyway, having committed this virtual and dastardly crime, we rushed out into the street where our yellow van and it's 'flower power' paint scheme waited across the street. I suggested we didn't drive it, but instead found a dark corner to hide in until the heat was off (you can sort of tell I don't commit crimes like this in real life).

And the outcome of this sorry tale of criminal outrage?.... Never got there. The garage across the yard opened for business and I woke to the sound of wheel nuts being loosened. Well, if I've learned one thing from my sleepy fantasy, it's that I'm a really crap crook.

Waving Goodbye To The Heat

Is our current heatwave over? Weathermen predict cooler temperatures for the week ahead following a wave of thunderstorms crossing the West Country as I speak. Earler this morning the clouds were indeed heavy and grey. Now they're white and hazy. Have I missed the storms? Or more to the point, have the storms missed me?

The End Is Nigh

Recent reports suggest Britain could be suffering 100,000 new cases of Swine Flu every day by August. Well thats wiped out the population of Britain in two years. One does hope that the treatments are effective (especially as bogus tablets are now in circulation) and that the virus isn't in a bad mood. If it is, this could be my last blog entry ever. Assuming anyone out there is still alive to read it. What a nightmarish vision of the near future....

On the other, I suppose it is remotely possible that Mr Burnham was none too good at maths. Or using calculators. Or maybe he just dreamt those numbers up?