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Government Sponsorship


caldrail

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I have seen the shape of things to come. At the Geneva Motor Show, the Royal College of Arts have unveiled ambulances that will be rushing to our aid in as little as four years from now - don't take that literally. Now get this. One of them has ejector seats to speed paramedics to your side. What happens if the patient is in a tunnel? Does the paramedic get issued with a helmet?

 

Another design has a fold out detachable medical center. Isn't that dead cool? Once the paramedics have landed and folded away their chutes, they all get together and open it out. "Left.. Left.. Gently... Woah! Back! Back!... Ok, Fred, lift it this way..."

 

No, seriously, it's a brilliant idea. Retired medics will find jobs waiting for them in the furniture removals business. At least that way they'll know what to do when the furniture owners have heart attacks.

 

Now that the government is strapped for cash, I start to understand why. Having sponsored the idiots who dreamt up these Heath Robinson contraptions, perhaps they might consider actually sponsoring the Health Service like wot they say they do. Leave the artists to wallow in their own ego's.

 

Job Opportunity

I have just applied to become Mayor of Swindon.

 

Yes, I'll say that again.

 

I have just applied to become Mayor of Swindon. Well someone has to sort this mess out, and if Boris Johnson can become Mayor of London I feel fully qualified to run my own home town. Updates to my political career will be posted as they arrive.... Hello?

 

Dog of the Week

Sophie - well done girl! An australian cattle dog was washed overboard on a sailing trip and swam for five miles to safety on an uninhabited island. Discovered four months after she was given up for dead by Rangers checking up on the islands now smaller population of goats, she's been returned to her owners. You just have to smile. I suspect now she's gone the goats are happier too.

 

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It's all me at the moment. I should hear in the next month whether I'm a suitable candidate for world domination... ahhh... I mean, stewardship of Swindonian Institutions.

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