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The Queues Get Longer


caldrail

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Yep, it's that day of the fortnight. Time to sign on. As it's my number one social engagement this week I thought I'd be fashionably late, and as expected, there was a crowd of bored dole seekers waiting in long queues. Eventually I got called forward, and waited in the secondary queue inside the office. I just love this system of theirs. One queue after another.

 

In fact, the woman who dealt with my claim wasted no time. "Have you managed to apply for any jobs?" She asked me quizzically. Cheeky woman, of course I have. Satisfied I had the nerve to brazen it out (though I have actually applied for the jobs!) she had me sign the docket and that was it. I was in and out of the desk in less than five minutes.

 

On the way out I saw one attractive young lady, looking slightly exotic, downbeat, but not tarty. To be fair, everyone else noticed her too, and I heard the attentive security guard ask where she came from. Brazil. Brazil? She's come all the way from South America to sign on the dole in rainy Swindon?

 

She breezed past me without a second look. Hey, am I losing my charismatic celebrity aura? Or is it because the security guards get all the chicks in the dole office?

 

Actually, I think its more to do with being too poor. Just my suspicion there.

 

Queue of the Week

It seems Wacko Jacko is back. Michael Jackson has left his chimp at home in fairyland and has come to London with a spotted hanky over his shoulder full of merchandising to play his last ever comeback. Am I missing the point? What sort of comeback is it if you only mean to play a few gigs in London and hang up the white glove afterward? Well it seems an astute move as all his old fans are coming out of the cupboard and queuing for tickets. I hope they see a good thriller. No really, us idiots get a bad press and its about time he got out more.

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