I knew it was a bad omen. As I came into the library this morning there was a horde of children all sat cross-legged in a crescent, completely blocking the stairs... excuse me... just passing through... Ooops, sorry kid....

Ok. Up the stairs.... Woah! Didn't expect the hidden trapdoor opening onto a bottomless pit... But its ok, an old lady offers me a whip to grab on to. I wander along the long forgotten aisles of dusty books.... Walking in front of a beam of sunlight, spears extend from the reference section, with the skeleton of an ignorant teenager still hanging from the rusty barbed points.... At last! Cubicle thirty three. I tell me minions to wait , and I sit to sit down and do my internet stuff. Well, I was... Oh no.... A twenty stone library member is bearing down on me....

"Sorry mate (belch) I've booked this PC." He says. I make my escape as the hordes have gone back to their treasure trail. A crowd of keen treasure hunters run past my cubicle reciting numbers. At least I had the sense not to sit in cubicle thirty five.

So, if you still haven't found the treasure yet, don't give up, because given the state of british education its looking unlikely the kids will find it first.

New Order of the Week

A little while ago Gordon Brown was telling the world he wanted to see a New Order. Thats just political rhetoric, right? Wrong. He wants to order us around and make us pay for it. Of course you already know that, but it seems now the government were planning to raise taxes where no taxes have risen before. I said somewhere else a few years ago that New Labour were slowly turning Great Britain into Britslovakia. Well whaddaya know? I was right.

Now if you've excuse me, I need to find a polish phrase book in this library.