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Musing on Motorcycles


caldrail

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Funny things motorbikes. When you're young they seem so iconic. When you old they seem so symbolic. When they blast up the street they seem so noisy.

 

When I was very young I used to see Evel Knievel featured on the news, preparing once again to crash his bike spectacularly in front of thousands. He wasn't the first to do motorcycle stunts by any means, the 'Wall of Death' sometimes featured in circuses and so on, but Mr Knievel had a talent for publicity. It seems though he had little talent for riding. Nonetheless, he had no regard for the dangers involved, and you can't help but admire him for that.

 

You can't help but admire the media circus that followed him. I too had a motorcycle stunt toy. A sort of wind up thingy that shot off a launcher across the jury-rigged leap of death-defying scale between stacks of books and plywood boards. That poor toy always ended as a mangled heap of plastic againt the opposite wall. The funny thing was the painted expression on his face. A permanent grin like "This is hell... Help me..."

 

These days though the level of talent involved in motorcycle stunts has improved a great deal. I see tv programs where youngsters make astonishing leaps and arrive with astronautic precision on the earth ramp the other end. A few days ago I watched a 'freestyle motocross' event in which they not only leap, but perform backflips and aerial gymnastics en route. Astonishing.

 

For me though motorcycles were never a step toward manhood. I went straight for cars. I've done some pretty daft things in them in my younger days (good grief why are human beings so completely irresponsible when they're eighteen?) but to be honest I can't claim to have leapt thirteen double decker buses in one.

 

I also know that many older people buy motorcycles to recapture that spirit of youth. Harley Davidsons seem to be the most popular for that, though why this is so is beyond me, since almost everyone else spits in fury at at the very name of that manufacturer. Personally I have no intention of trying to recapture my youth. Why would I need a second childhood? Most people think I haven't left my first one yet.

 

Reminisence of the Week

I was working as a delivery driver, and one of my stops was a boatyard north of Henley. I found the place, delievered thepackage, got the signature, and set off for my next destination. I stopped before pulling out onto the main road. Look left, look right. Some distance away to my right was a lone motorbike. No conflicting traffic then, so I turned left onto the road and proceeded toward a nearby bridge over the River Thames.

 

This bridge was at an angle to the road, almost hidden by riverside trees. It was also an old victorian humpbacked stone bridge with no way to see anything coming the other side of it. Then in my mirror I spotted the rider. Just before the bridge he was attempting to overtake. I widened my eyes in alarm. He can't be serious?

 

He was. He went for it. The little two stroke opened up and buzzed like a manic wasp. Then I noticed a car coming over the bridge. Being in a van, I was much higher than the rider passing on my right, and I doubt he saw it. I braked to let the rider past and winced as the car turned the bend in the face of the bike.

 

The rider swept past me and swerved back into lane with inches to spare. He wobbled a little before accelerating away across the bridge and that was it. He was gone.

 

He was very nearly a goner. Why are eighteen year olds so irresponsible on motorbikes? Actually, I can imagine his adrenaline rush afterward, and a big grin on his face from having faced danger and surviving. Somehow though.... I doubt he was competition for Evel Knievel, talent or not.

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Your reminiscence reminds me of a near death experience I had when I was a young foolish 18yr old on holiday in Kavos on the Greek island of Corfu.

One day my friends and I decided to hire some scooters for the day and go and explore the island, none of us had motorcycle licenses or any real experience on two wheels before but instantly turned into Barry Sheen as soon as we got on our clapped out old scooters. Off we set on our adventure dressed in a pair of shorts and flip flops and nothing else, well maybe a bit of factor 15 on our backs, we didn't want to burn did we!!!!!

We were racing along the road when I spotted my gap to take the lead so I went for it, after narrowly squeezing past my rival I gained the lead only to be slowed down by a bus full of tourists, so in a moment of pure idiocy I decided to extend my lead by over-taking the bus just as it happened to be going round a fairly sharp bend and to my horror just as I was half way past the bus I spotted another bus coming in the opposite direction!!!!!! Aaargggggghh!!!!!

I absolutely shit myself!! But I managed to keep the bike quite close to the first bus and squeeze through the gap and come out the other side in one piece......Just. Once clear of the bus I pulled over to the side of the road, got of the bike and gave myself a good few slaps about the face. After a few minutes my mates caught up and said that they couldn't believe how I managed to get out of that encounter with the buses un -scathed, obviously I played it cool, told them it was a piece of piss and that I had it under control, well I didn't want them to know that I was shaking like a shitting dog did I!!!

 

Safe to say that I rode the bike very conservatively for the rest of the day, and I've never hired a bike while on holiday again.

 

When I look back on it now though it makes me chuckle, I can still see the horrified faces of the bus drivers and passengers as a skinny young lad in a pair of shorts on a clap out old scooter (with his eye's closed most of the time) attempts to squeeze between their buses, I think it was something similar to this :D:D:D:D

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