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Peace and Quiet


caldrail

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Its all gone very quiet. Now the main library is hut while they move premises, I walk down to the sports centre and use their facilities. Strangely, it all seems very empty. The creche isn't huddled in a group by the window chanting nursery ryhmnes tunelessly. Kids aren't re-enacting the Battle of Britain.

 

I know whats wrong. Its AM. Its been so long since I've seen him have a good whinge or stop the world because he can't send his emails. Good grief - don't tell me he's actually done what he said he was going to and leave our shores for South Africa?

 

Careful AM - those zulus are tough hombres....

 

Oh... No, I was wrong. There he is, buyng stuff at Sainsbury's supermarket. He seems very downtrodden these days. I wonder if one of those librarians finally had enough of him?

 

Poodle of the Week

Goes to that gentle natured animal that approached me wagging its tail and almost smiling in its canine warmth. You know, dogs have personalities too, and this little one was just fun. It looked up, wagged its tail even faster, I gave it a pet and I guess we were both happy. The owner apologised for the dogs intrusion into my world and I answered that I wasn't bothered, then I noticed the expression on the owners face change.

 

The next thing I noticed was a warm wetness on my trouser leg. Fido was here.

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Are poodles really dogs? We had them as kids, and I'm convinced that they're really cousins to the canine group...but are inferior. Must be the puffy tails and stuff.

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As a male of the species, I'm naturally drawn to the larger saliva producing eating machines. Poodles are fluffy toys aren't they? Not suitable for ordinary blokes. Or is that simply because we use pets as social indicators? In which case, I know my place.

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"The next thing I noticed was a warm wetness on my trouser leg. Fido was here."

 

This brings me nicely to a joke told to me by a friendly taxi-driver. What is the difference between a poodle peeing down your leg and a Rottweiler peeing down your leg?

 

You let the Rottweiler finish.

 

:D Well, I quite liked it...

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