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The Smugness of Automated Doors


caldrail

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In Douglas Adams' Hitchhikers Guide To The Galaxy, Marvin the paranoid android moans and groans about intelligent doors, about how smug they are at completing their task of opening for their human masters. Well, he would groan even more at the doors to a local shopping mall. There's a three second delay between their sensors detecting your presence and deciding whether or not to allow you entry. Small boys pretending to be aeroplanes bounce off them in confusion. Adults trying to slip by get whacked as the door decides to close anyway. Sometimes the doors just stay there inert whilst you look an idiot in front of them.

 

Doors? Don't talk to me about doors....

 

Meanwhile, Back At The Brewery...

The local newspaper dispkay the headline - Royals Visit Brewery.

 

What an image. Her Majesty stumbling toward the limousine, crown askew, saying "What delightful brew... One is (hic).. quite light-headed.."

 

Then again, perhaps after generations of governmental experience dating back to the Dark Ages, perhaps the Royals really can organise a booze-up in a brewery? Labour party please take notes...

 

The Listening Party?

Talking of the Labour Party, our Prime Minister appears to have had enough of the media reporting gleefully on fuel protests and has slapped a gagging order on them. It seems Gordon Brown has gotten fed up of listening already.

 

Caldrails Guide To Political Polls

Labour Party - :P

Conservative Party - ;)

Liberal Democrats - ;)

Everyone Else - ;)

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Gordon Brown seems like he's trying everything to NOT be Tony Blair...hey, I get it. But still...he reminds me of the 'typical' John Cleese Monty Python character...'authority figure' who never has real control and is a bit grumpy. He's in need of a 3 week holiday with lots of drink and sex. Dude, seriously, let your hair down....

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What? Gordon Brown? Mr Family Man and your neighbourhood caring sharing Prime Minister with an ear for the needs of his adoring low paid public?

 

You've got to be joking. As soon as he discovers people enjoy themselves he'll slap a tax on laughter.

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