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First timer


cornelius_sulla

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I got promoted! This is the first entry of my first ever blog on the net. Thankyou UNRV, Primus Pilus and anyone else important whose arse I may have neglected kissing. I love this site, and this is a signal honor in my opinion, even if to other more experienced people it is 'just a blog' and a ho hum kind of achievement. Not to me, mates. This is the shizzle.

I'm writing a stand up comedy routine at the moment. There is an open mic at the local comedy club next month for new talent (read victims), a mate is the MC. He dared me to have a crack, called me a pussy and all the usual insults when I copped out, offered to bet me a large amount of moolah, generally pestered me until I said I would do it. Now pride stops me from backing out. I hate losing a bet, especially to that clown.

But I was thinking about giving it a whirl anyway. I went and watched a few at the last open mic and thought, here's a challenge. I admired the guts of theses guys and gals to get up in front of strangers and potentially tank. Many of them did. I made a point of going up and shaking the hands of those who tanked after, offer them some support. It was noticeable that the rest of the punters regarded them as they would something smelly that they just stood in.

Doing this kind of thing is scary to many people, but I reckon I've got a head start. I'm a guitarist and singer (yeller) in a band, so I figured that can only be marginally less nerve wracking. The difference is that if someone doesn't like what your playing, you just carry on and drown out their boo's or ignore their indifference. No such luck in standup. I'm thinking of working a guitar into my act so I've got something to hide behind - I always feel more comfortable with a guitar and being able to play it has always given me confidence.

This gives me goose bumps just writing about it. I was less nervous when I jumped out of a plane. I've surfed with sharks and felt less nervous! And the gig is still about a month away.

I'm considering going to university to study English and History, get a Bachelors Degree and become a teacher. There is a real need in this country for good, male teachers. I think I have the skills to be one although I may be completely deluded. Still thinking about it; three years is a long time.

I'm a blogger! SWEEEET!

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Hey, hey, the new promotion looks good on you, mate! And cheers on accepting the dare to do the stand-up comedy! What a great blog entry that will make, a month from now!

 

-- Nephele

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Cheers, neph. Actually, it was reading your's and G.O's blog that made me want one so much.

 

I never had a blog before coming to UNRV. It's kind of addictive. Best thing about blogging here at UNRV instead of at those many blog-hosting sites on the 'net, is that you've already got friends here as your audience, whom you can mention in your blog, and others will know who the hell you're talking about. :D

 

-- Nephele

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That's what appealed. I like it here and I have friends to whom what I'm writing has some relevance. You all seem to take the piss out of each other regularly, too, which I like. Not to mention there is some really funny shit in these blogs!

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That's what appealed. I like it here and I have friends to whom what I'm writing has some relevance. You all seem to take the piss out of each other regularly, too, which I like. Not to mention there is some really funny shit in these blogs!

 

Yep! Hey, I think I read somewhere in one of your postings that you're part Maori? Did I get that right? I see that you're using the Maori name for New Zealand in your profile -- can you speak some Maori?

 

-- Nephele

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That's what appealed. I like it here and I have friends to whom what I'm writing has some relevance. You all seem to take the piss out of each other regularly, too, which I like. Not to mention there is some really funny shit in these blogs!

 

Yep! Hey, I think I read somewhere in one of your postings that you're part Maori? Did I get that right? I see that you're using the Maori name for New Zealand in your profile -- can you speak some Maori?

 

-- Nephele

 

Yes, I am Maori, I also have Samoan, German and Scottish blood. I speak Maori fluently, so do my children. My sig is an ancient Maori proverb. It means 'Ask me, what is the most important thing in the world. I answer, it is people, it is people, it is people.'

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Yes, I am Maori, I also have Samoan, German and Scottish blood. I speak Maori fluently, so do my children. My sig is an ancient Maori proverb. It means 'Ask me, what is the most important thing in the world. I answer, it is people, it is people, it is people.'

 

Cool! Do you have Maori names in your family tree that you know of -- and do you also know their meanings? I'd love to add some Maori names to my collection.

 

-- Nephele

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Welcome and congratulations!! If I could, I'd buy you a beer!

 

Thanks mate. Are we the resident pissheads, or what?

You'll come to find that this place is full of pissheads, I think its a prerequisite for promotion. By pissheads, for pissheads.

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Yea! Don't forget, you have a little Roman in you!

Stand up, great! Maybe you tape some of it so we can all see it. At least you don't have to get messy if we throw tomatoes at you! haha!

Congrats to getting your children to speak the language! My children are so stubborn! If only children would listen to their parents! Like I did, not! Knowing another language, whatever it may be is so important in this world!

Congrats on the blog!

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Ringa pakia!

Uma tiraha!

Turi whatia!

Hope whai ake!

Waewae takahia kia kino!

 

 

Ka mate, ka mate

Ka ora

Ka mate, ka mate

Ka ora

Tēnei te tangata pūhuruhuru

Nāna i tiki mai whakawhiti te rā

Upane...Upane

Upane Kaupane"

Whiti te rā,!

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Yea! Don't forget, you have a little Roman in you!

Stand up, great! Maybe you tape some of it so we can all see it. At least you don't have to get messy if we throw tomatoes at you! haha!

Congrats to getting your children to speak the language! My children are so stubborn! If only children would listen to their parents! Like I did, not! Knowing another language, whatever it may be is so important in this world!

Congrats on the blog!

Cheers, Ateria. A couple of stiff drinks and she'll be right on the night, I reckon. Thankyou for your compliments, but my kids had no choice, really. I wouldn't speak to them in English.

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Ringa pakia!

Uma tiraha!

Turi whatia!

Hope whai ake!

Waewae takahia kia kino!

 

 

Ka mate, ka mate

Ka ora

Ka mate, ka mate

Ka ora

Tēnei te tangata pūhuruhuru

Nāna i tiki mai whakawhiti te rā

Upane...Upane

Upane Kaupane"

Whiti te rā,!

 

NICE, GPM! You even got the punctuation marks for elongated vowels in there! If you want, I can translate it for you.

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GPM! Sorry it took so long, I forgot that I said I would translate.

The first part of the haka is consists of orders from the kaea (leader) to his kapa (group) preparing them for in their stance and attitude for the haka. The second part, (Ka Mate) is the actual haka itself. This is the famous haka called 'Ka Mate' used by The All Blacks for the last century or so.

 

Ringa pakia!

(a command to begin slapping your hands on your thighs)

Uma tiraha!

(a command to puff out your chest)

Turi whatia!

(a command to bend your knees)

Hope whai ake!

(a command to straighten your back from your waist - not quite sure about this one, never encountered it before with this haka, but in others it means for you to put your hands on your hips)

Waewae takahia kia kino!

(a command to stamp your right foot in time with the rest of the group, and menacingly)

 

Ka mate, ka mate

(Will it be death for me?)

Ka ora

(Will it be life?)

Ka mate, ka mate

(Will it be death for me?)

Ka ora

(Will it be life?)

Tēnei te tangata pūhuruhuru

(Behold the brave man)

Nāna i tiki mai whakawhiti te rā

(Who caused the sun to shine again)

Upane...Upane

(Up I climb)

Upane Kaupane"

(Up I climb to the top)

Whiti te rā,!

(Into the light of the sun!)

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