The weather was nasty. Strong cold winds, heavy showers - it felt like I was walking home along the deck of a ship in the midst of an Atlantic squall. The car salesman stood leaning in the doorway smoking as I stumbled past. You could see his mind working. I felt an unsteady red dot land on my wallet. That salesman is starting to spook me a little. I wonder if he's a cannibal on the quiet?

Another thing is starting to spook me a little too. Why is it that drivers of brand new shiney Subaru Impreza's (bedecked in rally style paintwork) always floor the pedal when they pass me? Whats the point? I'm not envious - I hate those silly cars anyway - but I can't afford one even if I thought they were the best thing since Thrust SSC. But why don't they do that with any other pedestrians? Is this some sort of conspiracy by a network of Subaru owners? Is there a secret society for drivers of hyped up steroidal versions of family cars? Perhaps I haven't learned the correct handshake yet.

Eco-Friendly Move of the Week

It appears that vehicles are now to be subjected to enviromental testing on entering inner london. heavy lorries are the first to be targeted, requiring that fleets of goods vehicles must now be modified to bring them up to standard. Which of course means that on top of heavy fuel duties (non-brits might be shocked at how much tax we pay on petrol - its about 75% on top, plus we get taxed on that) hauliers must now pay for this work to be done, and for fines if they don't to [pay for the army of snoopers employed to enforce this new law. Which makes transport more expensive, which hurts the economy, which puts people out of work, which means there are fewer customers and less need for lorries in the first place. Excellent. Lets improve the enviroment by dismantling the british infrastructure. No noise, no pollution, no leering lorry drivers, no blocked roads..... and no food in the shops. But hey, since our roads are now blocked by floods caused by lorries melting the polar ice caps, perhaps this is to be expected? I don't know about you, but I think these enviromental rulings are just excuses to extract cash.