My daily routine of late has been simple. Wake up, slide clumsily out of bed, limp across to the window, and look out on yet another bright blue sky. Another fine, sunny day. Not too hot, just comfortable, at least as long you avoid strenuous activity. That's not difficult when you're unemployed.
Today though was different. A dreary grey morning with an ever present sense that drizzle is about to break out. To make things worse, today I'm scheduled to help out at the museum, and as we all kn
There are those who say I don't write enough about sex. Certainly they want more gossip about my girlfriends, but unfortunately, since becoming long term unemployed I can no longer afford them, and in any case, women aren't usually turned on by flirtacious old fogies unless they also happen to be filfthy rich. Despite continued investigations by the Department of Work & Pensions, it appears I'm just another poverty stricken claimant.
However, I shall not be daunted. Here then is the scan
Today we discuss the subject of fantasy. I don't mean pictures of naked women in silly positions (though I imagine the people who like those sort of images rely on fantasy more often than not) nor getting dressed in medieval style clothes and running round ruined castles with rubber swords. No, I have other things in mind.
In the wake of the shocking explosions in Norway, the media have been keen to show photographs of the perpetrator dressed like an all action special agent. It does illustr
It turns out that I'm among the first recruits for the Work Programme. If anyone wants to know what being a guinea pig is like, I might be able to tell you. Already I've set a record by being the first claimant to have done his initial assessment twice, though I have to confess, that's because the first one was mislaid.
"Things always go wrong when you're around." Observed one other claimant, a chap I remember seeing here and there over the last couple of years. He was one of my fellow fork
"Does anyone know anything about the Work Programme?" Asked the lady giving us our induction to what is a two year course aimed to return long term unemployed like me to the workplace.
Well there' been some horror stories circulating.
"Like what?"
That we will have to do 38 hours a week on our job searching.
"Oh no!" She chuckled, "That would be like a full time job wouldn't it?"
Exactly my thoughts. Well so far the programme seems very easy going, but I did hear hints that i
Little update; had the hour with a personal trainer, and he put together a program for the gym. Lots of lifting going on now. Every part of my body has muscles that ache now, but its all for a good cause. Weight drops as slow as ever but i am determined. The nice thing is that the one hour CrossStep improved dramatically. A month ago i would manage in one hour 7 kilometers = 4.34 miles, now i get in on hour 9 kilometers = 5.59 miles. Maybe with my next update i will drop below 110 kg, i keep you
Wow, I finally finished. It took the better part of 5 weeks of planning, learning, and implementation, but the major summer project was finished as of Friday morning: the Workshop Site.
Ok, I'll explain: like many community colleges (and often in 4-year universities), our college has workshops for those learning and/or improving their English reading and writing skills. Some of the workshops are grammar-based, others are study-skill-based, but they're all open to any student so that they c
Okay let's see, what can I write for the blog this friday? I've done hikes, injuries, insults, urban foxes, job searching, and finally resorted to lame gags about badger culling. Luckily for me, I didn't have to think too hard about anything else because the museums resident journalist, DW, made his appearance.
I first met DW when he was running a modelling agency which he assures us with a big grin was earning him truck loads of cash. After organising one event at a local night club with a
Starting the day in a good mood I went about my business. Everyone seems to be in a good mood too. Happy smiling shop assistants, and warm if cloudy weather. It just feels like it's going to be a good day. Or at least, it would be if I hadn't cracked a rib during my collision with the supermarket car park. It only hurts when I laugh.
"Step into a recruitment office if you want to play soldiers" Growled a voice as I bounded joyfully up the stairs at the library. Oh great. Another clown. That'
Having been so impressed with that new footbridge across the railway line, today I decided to head out for a hike in country. Get some fresh air, exercise, and a few cool pictures of no possible use to anyone. Of course I did the requisite job search at the library first. Always see to your chores.
There we go. A bunch of cool pictures taken and time to head off into the hills. I did make a half hearted attempt to photograph a passing train, just for the heck of it you understand, but I wasn
...little update, shed a bit of weight but nothing to brag about.
The fun part will be tomorrow as i won an hour with a personal trainer at my local gym, i hope he knows what he is doing...
The lady on the supermarket till is an endangered species these days. They're all being replaced by robots. Well, until a bunch of guys with dark suits and sunglasses escort this particular lady to a large black vehicle waiting outside, I'll avail myself of the customer service.
"Are you going to Fairford?" She asked. I looked out the window, surveyed the grey clouds and damp ground, and said no, I wasn't. She meant of course the RIAT air display, our annual traffic jam north of Swindon. Fai
Anyone expecting something about Led Zeppelin is going to be sorely disappointed. Today I took a stroll across some farmland not to far from where I live. In the not too distant future these fields will be gone, replaced by modern brick shoeboxes we call houses, all packed densely together around a maze of curving streets that defies anyones sense of direction.
I'd already had a good view of Wichelstok, the latest addition to Swindons housing needs, built in the Ray Valley between Swindon a
Sunday morning and the rain has eased. Some might claim that was proof God exists, but I know different, because he wouldn't have foisted BFL upon the world. There she was in the library foyer, sat waiting to find her next victim. She smiled to herself as I scowled.
Luckily Mr R opopped in. He's a regular at the library too, a cheerful chatty sort of guy who seems to spend all day there playing 'fruit machine' programs. Before he gets there though, he too runs the gauntlet of BFL.
Too l
Decisions, decisions. What is a girl to do? I have choices for my weekend entertainment, and even choices regarding who to spend it with.
I'm dying to go to the beach...I haven't been all summer, although I did go in May. But it's not exactly beach weather: foggy, cold, windy. Actually, it's typical beach weather if we were in June. Oh, wait, this is July. Hmmmm...maybe not.
Part of me wants to go to stay home to work on a new project--doing voice overs on PowerPoints for work. Ye
Okay. I've managed to get myself back off the floor. Wiped the last tears from my face, and given a last chuckle or two. But why, you may ask?
A couple of posts ago I mentioned that I would fall off my chair laughing if I ever heard a boss moaning that he couldn't find the staff. When I checked the local paper for job vacancies an editorial piece headlined with "Skilled Workers Are Hard To Find".
No, they're not. You simply have to create them instead of fishing in a market that everyone
How long has it been since I last wandered around Lawns? Come to think of it, it's been a while, so a couple of days ago I did indeed wander around. Nice days do things like that to me.
Regular readers will know the name 'Lawns' because I've complained often enough about our parks department, who seem determined to remove anything green in them. I've never seen trees looking so scared.
Eventually I passed what used to be the grounds of the local manor house. The Goddard family packed th
Hello all, and welcome to the GhostOfClayton twice-fortnightly blog. Little warning: some of it may contain �adult themes�, but all in a proper, medical context.
A letter arrived on the doormat here at OfClayton Towers last week, and I recognised it straight away. It had a cute little anthropomorphised blood drop (who I understand to be called Billy) on the back, and I have had one of these every three months for about the last five or six years. It was the notification that the time had arr
Phone hacking is the big news story right now. Frankly I've had enough of these reports. Yes, it is scandalous, and has already shut down a national newspaper, but I seriously don't believe Gordon Brown said anything remotely of interest to the general public no matter how the journalists tried to word it.
The truth of this ongoing scandal is the realisation that Rupert Murdoch owns too big a slice of british media and those who want that issue addressed are making sure it is. Even this morn
"EEEEERGH!"
Believe me, at three in the morning, that high pitched screach is enough to scare the living daylights out of you. Yes, it's the urban foxes again, lurking in the darkness to hunt smaller nocturnal animals lurking in the darkness, or the bonus of edible rubbish we humans have discarded, or as I've come to believe, just to wander around and annoy people with high pitched screaching.
This time the fox was very close to the backs of the houses where I live. That's unusual. Norma
So, NASA is ending an era with the last space shuttle launch. The 'nauts linked up with the International Space Station, there was good cheer to be had by all, and down here we're supposed to lament and cherish this last bit of space exploration by us 'Mericans for a bit. Hmmmm.
Let's face it, I grew up at the very end of the Cold War, so this 'Space Race' stuff is beyond me a bit. Oh, sure, I love sci-fi movies and stuff, and would love to get a chance to see the earth and everything e
This is hard, much much harder than i thought. I fear with age the ability to loose weight fast disappears....
I tried really hard with exercise and not eating too much, despite all my efforts for a long time i was stuck at around the same weight level. It was as if my body pulled a switch and decided to not loose any weight anymore. Only a few days ago this "threshold" seems to have been broken through and i finally have a new weight to announce, slow very slow but nevertheless the pounds
