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The Rushey Platt Villa

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It's Still Snowing... Snowing I tell You...

The misery goes on. In very un-swindon-like style, the snow started again last night and as I glance out the window of the library, it's just begun cascading down in thick torrents. Our local council now has only two days of grit reserves left to clear our roads and keep Swindon moving.   I'm biting my nails.   Weather Update of the Week Oh. Its just reverted to that thin sprinkle of fine drizzly snow. Panic over. Phew.

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I Woke Up This Morning

Yep, it snowed. I woke up to the sound of people falling over. A garage mechanic shovelling snow off the ramp to the yard made sure I got out of bed. I'm going outside. I may be gone some time.     What is going on? Swindon is alive with people. Cars crawling forward sensibly at a steady pace. People laughing, joking, gritting pavements. Youths dragging plastic sleds they got for Christmas four years ago and never thought they'd ever use. Help... Drowning in community spirit....   A ten y

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Slippery When Frozen

Last night I sat back to watch a little tv. In both senses. Outside I heard a revving car engine and tire squeals. Oh come on you idiot, surely you're not pratting around in this weather? Sheesh...   Later I became aware of a persistent rumble. I get that from big diesel engines idling outside by the pedestrian crossing. Except this time it just went on and on. Its uncomfortable because the vibration carries through the house. Looking out the window I spotted why. The single decker bus outside

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Frozen Squib

Back in 1908, Swindon was inundated with 15 inches of snow. Thats more then we got yesterday. The result of all those warnings of blizzards and sub-zero temperatures resulted in this picturesque scattering of snowflakes.     This does in happen Swindon - a couple of decades ago there was a country wide snowfall over Britain. Drifts six feet deep cut off entire communities and made travel all but impossible. In Swindon, not a single snowflake. I would love to know why Swindon so rarely gets

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Russia Has Arrived

I woke this morning to that dull white glow through the curtains. I knew that meant snow. Well it was no suprise - the warnings had been made regularly on tv for the last couple of days. What felt strange though was the curious lack of rumble. There was no background noise of passing cars, nor was the house shaking as lorries rumbled past.   Walking down to the library, Swindon is deathly quiet. There's hardly any tire tracks in the snow, which is merely a surface covering, albeit a very slipp

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Cold Winds

There's a very cold wind blowing through the trees of Rushey Platt. Cold air from Russia has blown in and already the weather reports are warning of severe conditions. The AA have advised motorists to take warm clothing with them as gale force winds and drifts of heavy snow are expected. The reverse is going on in Australia right now, where winds from the continents interior are blowing hot air over the coastal regions where everybody lives.   There's going to be comment about Global Warming o

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Get It Whilst Its Hot

I got the good news last night. The International Monetary Fund have suggested that Britain might be in recession for as much as twenty years, struggling to pay off debts while the rest of the west recover nicely thank you. Twenty years? You mean I'm going to bleat on about the economy and my lack of good fortune for two more decades? Should I cancel the Ferrari then?   Now That I Come To Think Of It Until a few years ago, life was simple. I had money in my pocket and a slightly fast car on t

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Sicknote?

"Trust Sicknote to get in the way... Should have stayed in bed..." Muttered AM as he shuffled past on his crutches. Was that comment directed at me? AM doesn't like me very much. Back in the days when the library was at its temporary hut, he had his favourite PC and used to bully people off it when he came in. He tried that with me once... "Come on, Mate, didn't you see my name on the screen?" No, I didn't, because it wasn't there and I couldn't have logged on if it was. And then I had to repeat

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Year of the Ox

Its the Chinese New Year, and since they haven't been inflicted deeply by the economic downturn, today they've been celebrating. It also happens to be Year of the Ox which is good news for me, because in Chinese astrology that's me - I'm an Ox. There you go, I've admitted it.   Get Away From It All Australia are advertising for a guy to run Hamilton Island, a tropical paradise, in a deal involving free flights, feeding turtles, collecting mail, scuba swimming, running a Hamilton Island blog,

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The Meaning of Liff

As you might have guessed, I spent last night watching Monty Python's third film, The Meaning Of Life, definitely the least funny of the three, and perhaps proof that Life isn't fun? Certainly the town I live in has tried to tell us its a great place to live ever since the railworks, our very own dark satanic mill, closed for business. Yet Swindon always seems so meaningless.   It does seem a little coincidental that I've chosen to discuss the Meaning of Life, especially since I seem to have s

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The Mood Is Black

Right. Time to sit down in my cubicle at the Library and while away an hour on the internet. It's quiet, nobodies showing off their bestial personal habits, and no mobuile phones... Uh-oh. I spoke too soon. The young black lady on the PC to me right whipped her phone out with practised ease. She spoke clearly, confidently, quietly, and for some strange reason, there was a very appealing tone to her voice. I found myself listening in. Oh no. I've turned into a sad eavesdropper. Oh well..   Now

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Watch Your Language

There's a tree in Savernake Forest that I know of. An unremarkable tree at first glance until you discover how old it is. That old fella was sprouting out of ground, fresh from the seed, roughly the same time William the Conqueror was striding ashore at Hastings.   That day in 1066 changed everything. From that point forwards, England and France would be uncomfortable neighbours, no doubt made worse by the Germanic roots of the Anglo-Saxons. Of course now we're on good terms, despite my succes

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In Their Own Minds

The big deal in Britain at the moment (apart from our economies disappearing act that is) happens to be the plans for the expansion of Heathrow airport. Now that the airport is operating at 99% capacity they want an extra runway which requires the demolition of two nearby villages and the loss of seven hundred homes and businesses. If they want more landing space, why not use the River Thames? The Americans have shown it can be done.   You have to hand it to the pilot of the Airbus 320 that ma

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Are We There Yet?

Apparently farmers in Sub-Saharan Africa will benefit from detailed digital maps of soil nutrient quality. At last they'll know why their farms are not doing well. Isn't technology useful? Perhaps not, considering the Skycar, a para-sailing dune buggy, currently setting out on a three thousand mile journey across Africa. These skycars are ridiculous. They proved it was a daft idea back in the fifties. Can you imagine the telephone calls from frustrated motorists?   "You have reached Traffic Co

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No Pain, No Gain

Mondays are the curse of modern civilisation. In times of yore, men of Englands Green and Pleasant Land woke from their slumber and stirred when they felt like it. Then along comes the hated miller and with the Industrial Revolution behind him, invented working hours and the tyranny of the clock began.   Now you might say that as an unemployed person I don't suffer from Monday-itis, but you'd be wrong. Required by the state to earn my paltry handouts by looking for work, I must also observe th

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Who Dunnit?

Mr Palmer, the leader of East Lindsey District Council, is unhappy. Strange lights have been seen in the Midlands sky for a while now, and now a turbine blade from a wind generator tower has been ripped off near his turkey farm. He wants the authorities to look into the recent UFO activity and in particular the damage they caused to one of our turbines.   The Ministry of Defence however has shown absolutely no interest in the goings-on, telling us that they won't investigate unless they percei

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Go Wilderness Young Man

There are people who think I do nothing but sit at home playing on my computer. Don't let them upset you Computer, they don't understand.. Ahem... Well, anyway from to time I drag myself away The great outdoors has an appeal for many of us and I'm no different, so occaisionally the urge to see over the next hill takes hold. I decided to get up early and hopefully catch some evocative sunrises or whatever. To my disappointment the weather was dull and cloudy as I left home at six in the morning.

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No Doom But Definitely Gloom

It all seems doom and gloom right now doesn't it? Gaza is being demolished, Russia is sulking over gas supply, high street stores are closing, businesses laying off workers, predictions of three million unemployed by next year. Even my blog is draped in despair these days. Well, I won't have it. So, in order to lighten the mood, for the first time in blog history I will now... *click* ... Huh?.... Who turned out the lights? Oh no, my PC is dying. All I've got left is a small blue dot on my monit

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All That Is Printed Is Not Employment

It was one of those job interviews you just know is going to be a disaster before you start. The office where it took place is literally down the road from I live, an upstairs premises with only a single door on the street to mark its presence and a source of confusion as you wander back and forth expected something more impressive.   Having found the door (I always have trouble with doors - Douglas Adams fans please note) I noticed the gloomy staircase with a carpet left unwashed since the mi

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Start As You Mean To Continue

I woke this morning earlier than I wanted - another job interview today. As usual, the bedroom is mildly cold but probably warmer than the front room! Anyhow, I threw back the duvet, shudderred in the loss of warm air, and tip toed to the curtains for a look outside. Snow!   It snowed last night. Not a huge blizzard by any means, more of a thin coat of that fine wet snow that quickly clogs and becomes frighteningly icy. We don't usually get any snow in January. These days, we tend to get a lig

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Who?

In a blaze of media exposure - and no shortage of publicity by BBC News - we finally know who is to be David Tennants replacement as Dr Who. For those who don't know its... ah.... Who?   They chose an actor who despite having leading roles in the past is pretty well unknown. A non-entity? Well, personally, I'm hugely miffed the BBC didn't demand and beg me to play the role. I am after all fully qualified. I turn up, I pull rabbits out of hats, then fade into nonethingness as someone else gets

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Cold Start

Way back when I was working in warehousing I often used to see people spending time in the toilets, usually sat in their cubicles smoking or reading newspapers behind closed doors, at least when they weren't pulling the toilet apart with their bare hands for something to do. It's something of a british tradition and one I used to sneer at.   Problem is, things are a little chilly in England right now. We've had sub-zero temperatures for a week now and last night it tried to snow. Some people m

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Secrecy

Hi there. As its the start of the new year, its the time for new year resolutions. Sadly the UN doesn't recognise my little nation state but that won't stop me. Luckily though no-one keeps resolutions for more than a few days which explains why third world dictators get away with flouting them. Most of us are required to pay lip service to these resolutions by our inlaws. Dictators have the unfair advantage that they can shoot theirs at will.   So without further ado, my first lip-service to n

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Survivng Christmas

Survival is so macho. Tell someone you've survived the wilderness and instantly your manliness score doubles. Women become breathless near you. Men become your greatest buddy and hang on your every word. At least I believe they do because the only wilderness I've survived is Swindon, and unfortunately I'm reliably informed that Swindon doesn't do much for your manliness.   The good news is that I survived Christmas. Survival is one of those dark arts you see featured on tv sometimes, with Ray

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