According to Jeremy Clarkson, the demise of the supercar is nigh. His romantic goodbye to petrol-guzzlers on Top Gear nearly had me bursting into tears. What is life, without passion? Let's face it, those ultra-eco-safe hybrid cars are about as passionate as yesterdays warmed up breakfast. There's something horribly socialist about the modern world. It's even showing signs of communist mediocrity and conformance. The world want drivers to be slow, safe, and silent.
On the one hand, I have to
Yo ho ho mee hearties, 'tis blowing a gale and the seas be rough. This be weather to sort out the landlubbers from old sea dogs. Haven't seen a good squall like this since last year. Batten down the hatches boys and break out the rum. Ye'll be needin' it fer the journey 'ome... Ha ha harrr.
They promised foul weather this morning and delivered on it. It is horrendous out there. For old sea dogs and parrots only. Wooden legs available while stocks last.
From the Window
A few days ago I w
Last night I started to feel a little warm. You know those restless nights where you just cannot achieve a state of blissful comfort no matter what permutation of bedroom artifacts you choose? Yes, it was one of those nights. I decided the atmosphere was a bit stale and opened a window, plodding back to bed in the vain hope of sleeping.
As I lay there staring at the gloom I could hear rainfall. It is curious what a gentle sound it has, how soothing it can be (providing of course, you're not
A quick jog through Lawns and it's back down to the library for my usual net-fest. I arrived before the inner doors were opened. The security guard, as usual, waited with professional calm for the exact second to stroll toward the locks, and I do suspect he enjoys the process immensely. It doesn't really matter of course, there's still a selection of books available for perusal and... Hello... What's that notice board over by the window?
It seems our councils have decided to pursue another m
In the last year or so I've been making half hearted efforts to maintain my physical fitness. The ennui of unemployment and its incessant requirement to stay active in the jobsearch has left me, ironically, with less time to devote to physical exercise. Slowly but surely I've become aware that hiking has become tougher on my reserves of energy, and that my rebellious waistline is advancing it's remorseless progress ahead of me.
Walking through town the other day I passed a shop dealing with
Is Tony Blair going for the EU's President job or not? I'm biting my nails as I speak. It is a bit worrying because Gordon Brown has started campaigning to get him the job, which raises the possibility that Mr Brown will one day follow as leader of our new European supersate. We're already going to have to pay an extra
Last night was a quiet evening. That's a refreshing change after the constant droning noises from my neighbours. A chance then to enjoy a good read, safe in the knowledge that nothing would disturb the atmosphere of peace and calm. The occaisional passing car made no difference, even the ones with stereos capable of setting off a major earthquake response. With the damp and uncertain weather outside, there wasn't much disturbance from pedestrians either.
Previously I've mentioned the noisy c
Sometimes I wonder if falling over is a communicable disease. A former boss, DS, has long demonstrated a complete inability to stay on her feet, drunk or sobre. It seems I'm starting to show signs of the same affliction.
My task for the day was simple. I have one of those desktop lamps that doesn't have a bulb to fit it. So I set off with the aim to find a suitable light bulb with which to illuminate the darkened recesses of my hovel. Unfortunately the lamp happens to be one of those old Woo
English weather is incredible. It's launched more conversations than the activities of fecund neighbours, and that really is saying something. Right now I'm sat staring out the window as the weather drifts by. One moment it's a sky of blue, then clumps of white cloud, then great cloaks of dark sombre grey, and I can see rainfall over West Swindon, all with the sun shining from the other direction. You know, it's occured to me the great thrill about our weather is the gambling element. Will I get
Some years a Cessna took off from Edinburgh. The pilot was giving his girlfriend a joyride in the local area. Unfortunately the pilot left his radio on 'transmit' which made it impossible for air traffic control to contact anyone on that frequency for more than an hour, during which personal conversations and long periods of intimate silence were heard.
What astonishes me is not the application to join the Half-Mile-Club, but that he succeeded in intimate relations within the very cramped co
It was just another day in rain soaked Swindon. A lorry rumbled past, bouncing on the road surface with loud rattles, spraying water on the faceless citizens scurrying from place to place. This is one tough town, where only the driest survive. Who knows? Maybe some mysterious dame will walk through my door and complicate my life. It was not to be. An impersonal text message arrived on my phone. SBD will collect your faulty laptop today between 07:00 and 20:00.
Oh? I wasn't informed about th
My first clue to the importance of the day was spotting the library security guard. He's a portly chap, walking with a pronounced sway, sort of like an oversized chimp. He was carrying a bunch of flowers. Never in my life have I seen him look so incongruous. I couldn't help asking him if this was part of his usual duties. He chuckled, but I think what he really wanted to do was punch my lights out.
Later I went to the library for my daily dose of internet goodness. What is going on? The inte
I blame the Moon. That lump of grey cheese hanging over our heads does all sorts of crazy things to human beings. Now it seems the guys at NASA have decided to plan ahead for more manned missions there. That new Aries 1X probe isn't going to be cheap. It's a lot of cash to spend to find a little buried ice on a rock two hundred and fifty thousand miles away.
Is this a good thing? On the one hand, I'm thrilled to bits that NASA haven't given up space exploration, despite the obvious danger a
As I've mentioned before, an extended spell of unemployment changes your perception of time. Life is at a slow pace, nothing hurried, and all those little things you used to cram into every spare five minutes now assume the status of your entire days activity. However, the recent near-fatal experience with my computer has changed all that. Suddenly I'm pitched into a battle of wills with the company that made the wretched thing.
The law says I'm entitled to a repair, replacement, or refund.
Entertainment is becoming harder to achieve without my trusty computer. Certainly I'm going to be a better guitar player from this interlude of electronic fulfillment (my neighbours might disagree) and I'll have time to get to grips with keyboards again. It also means that the desire for news has led me to start listening to the radio, which I usually ignore for more visual information.
Last night it so happened that Ricky Gervais was being interviewed. He's released a film called The Invent
The lesson of todays sermon is never to to take anything for granted. My worry is that this will sound more like an exercise in paranoia. Nonetheless, the events have occured, and behind it all lurks a reason. Let me explain.
I make no secret of my predeliction for using computers. They're versatile tools and sources of entertainment. But as with all complex machines, sometimes they go wrong. The ebb and flow of my computers reliability has inspired various posts on this blog already. At lea
After the dreary damp weather of the last few days the sunsine is back. That about sums up the last twenty four hours for me. Nothing much happened....
Oh yes. My downstairs neighbour left the hallway light on all nght. More news when I get it
Postal Woes
Royal Mail is threatening strikes shortly and so disruptions to services are expected. Will I notice? Just lately the post to my address contains all the neighbours letters too, and I suspect they're getting some of mine. Come on guys
I've written in the past of my doubts concerning astrology. Sure, there is something comforting about these hints of the fate awaiting us around the corner, it's just that those people writing the hints are peddling security blankets. Funny thing is though, and most likely by sheer coincidence, there are times when a commercial prediction comes spookily close to events in your life. Take yesterdays local newspaper for instance. Apparently the planet Venus is returning to my star sign about now a
Everyones worrying about money at the moment. I can't say I've any sympathy for those ministers of Parliament required to pay back allowance claims considered dubious - they've been on a gravy train for decades. It so happens the cash shortage might well impact on me. Not because my benefits are under threat, but because job opportunities aren't going to be so readily available in the future. Typical of this situation is the farce over a few stones.
Years ago there was a church just across t
When it comes to job interviews, you can tell a lot about the company from the information and advice they give you. Or not. It's been a while since I smelled a rat but something about this woman who phoned me a couple of days ago made me wonder. I quickly realised she was from an agency, though she din't tell me that, nor did she give any information about the job I'd originally enquired about. Not a good sign.
"Do you have transport?" She asked.... No.
"Have you got a bike?".... No.
Some years ago a guy I knew from my schooldays looked me up and we decided to have a pint or two, catch up with events, and basically fall over drunk at some in the proceedings. By strange quirk of fate, MS and I originally crossed paths over music. I was a keen up and going nowhere drummer, he was busy inventing new and interesting beeps on toy keyboards. I must confess, it was his idea to stage a charity rock concert at a local sports hall but an idea I got behind. We formed a band to take par
Close your eyes. Empty your mind. Picture a whitewashed thatched cottage, rose bushes lining the manicured lawn in front of it. Oak and chestnut trees forming a lush backdrop. The sun is shining, birds are singing, all is peaceful.
Now wake up. I don't know what sort of England you live in, but that rose-tinted image isn't anything like mine, which resembles an edwardian brick terrace, built in the days of cloth-cap engineering, Cars with stereos blaring pause at the traffic lights before vi
Hilary Clinton has made a fashionably late visit to our shores and naturally the press conference followed. It's becoming a bit of a soap opera. Is it just me, or are political speeches becoming a bit commonplace? To some extent that's partly because of modern media coverage. With so many channels and air-time to fill, it seems politicians are rising to the challenge of opportunity. I guess that's politics. If you want to get ahead in that business you need people to hear you.
The subject m
Another day... I drag myself out of bed and glance out between the curtains. It's been raining during the night and the yard outside is thoroughly wet. No matter, it's a bright and sunny morning, it'll soon dry out.
Our beloved Fuhrer, Gordon Brown, must also be feeling the same mood. He's just announced that Britain is 'bouncing back'. Well, he can quaff Happy Juice at breakfast if he wants, but he earns rather more money than most of us, so I don't suppose for one minute he's noticed how e
I don't often cook meals late in the day but last night it occured to me I hadn't eaten much and sure enough an unfamiliar and uncomfortable sensation was making itself felt in my belly. Okay, lets see what I've got in the cupboards... What's this?... A beef and ale pie?... Hey, I'd forgotten I had this and I'm in the mood. Bang that in the oven for thirty minutes at 230deg and prepare myself a feast.
What I hadn't realised was that my antiquaited cooker is in fact nuclear powered. It cooked
